


Various Misadventures of Era Hess and Co.

by Smitten_miqitten



Series: Era Hess' Unfortunately Odd Life [1]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: 5.0 spoilers, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Humor, Light Angst, Shadowbringers Spoilers, Smut, This just follows my WoL's story, shb spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2020-03-03
Packaged: 2020-04-08 08:09:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 30,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19103137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Smitten_miqitten/pseuds/Smitten_miqitten
Summary: This started as a character building exercise for me to make Era's backstory and experiences concrete. Era's canon follows the game events almost to a T, so these chapters are composed of scenes that happen either in-between cutscenes or expand on existing scenes somewhat.Chapters are arranged in chronological order, not post order, so check the Table of Contents for the chapter you want. Rating due to a couple little NSFW chapters.Latest chapter(s): Ch.15 Butterflies Scattered (NSFW)





	1. Table of Contents

**Author's Note:**

> A little background on Era:  
> She was born Aera aan Hess in a far northern Garlean province. Circumstances, to be detailed in later chapters, forced her family to flee to the Black Shroud to hide amongst the Keeper population there. As they approached the shores of the Shroud (yes, it has a coast), a storm sank the ship. Era alone was saved by Hydelyn for use as her champion, but was wiped of her memories and her emotions were dampened, leaving her with blunted affect, to make her more useful (without baggage) and pliant. She retains all her prior skills and knowledge, but no memories of having gained them.
> 
> Era is an Ilsabardian Keeper of the Moon with light brown skin with a greyish tint, periwinkle eyes , white hair, and a long fluffy tail.

  1. Chapter List and descriptions:
  2. Awakening- In which Era starts her journey in Eorzea.
  3. Memory- pre Cid/Wol. Era and Cid discuss their amnesia.
  4. Love- Thancred offers Era advice of the heart
  5. Nameday- Haurchefant picks a nameday for the amnesiac Era
  6. A Missed Opportunity- Cid bemoans his cold feet. Pre Cid/WoL
  7. Loss- In which Era deals, poorly, with grief.
  8. An Idle Fantasy - Aymeric has a very bad dream. From an angst ask prompt.
  9. Boredom- Pre Cid/WoL. Nero bullies Cid about his crush on the Warrior of Light
  10. Windows to the Heart- NSFW Cid/WoL, pre relationship.
  11. Just In Case- Cid/WoL. Era's confession
  12. Just In Case (Cid's Perspective)- Cid's viewpoint
  13. Omega- The second to final battle with Omega
  14. Butterflies- Cid/WoL sorta mildly saucy fluff? May get a bit of a rework.
  15. Butterflies Scattered (NSFW)-Cid/WoL their first time together :3 
  16. Breakfast-Cid/WoL fluff
  17. Limbo (NSFW) - Cid/WoL Spicytimes
  18. How Dare!?- Alisaie does not take kindly to her summoning to the First.
  19. Questions Upon Questions- Era badgers Emet-Selch, who seems familiar somehow.
  20. Shoebill- Some Alt timeline Cid/WoL angst and some implied Emet-Selch & WoL angst. (Just prior to Mt. Gulg)
  21. Incomplete- Era wanders the shadow of Amaurot, looking for clues. (Post 5.0 msq)
  22. Steward- Era pays respect to her fallen foe and...friend? (Post 5.0 msq)
  23. Date-Cid/WoL. A cute date. Also a cute proposal.
  24. Sickday- Cid/WoL fluff. Both are idiots and get each other sick.
  25. A Fine Gift- Era and the Ironworks Crew try and get Cid a gift for his nameday.
  26. Fervor- Cid/WoL. Cid and Era get a little frisky after an overlong seperation. Lightly nsfw.
  27. The past, pt.1 - Era's long forgotten past is revealed.
  28. The Past, pt.2 - A trip down memory lane.
  29. The Past, pt.3 - The resolution of this epic(?) memory trip




	2. Awakening

**Awakening**

She awoke to silence. Whatever had preceded this silence, she did not know. Her mind felt blank, with the kind of emptiness that can only come from something that  _had_ been full, but was no longer. The kind of emptiness that forces one feel its loss.

Had there been… screaming? That seemed correct, but the harder she tried to recall, the fuzzier everything got. The smell saltwater permeated her nostrils, but there wasn't any around. She couldn’t feel much of anything at all surrounding her, neither heat nor cold, nor ground nor air nor waves. She was vaguely aware of floating, but  _where,_  she couldn’t say. Her hand badly ached, as if it had been grasped far too tightly. But by whom? Many and more questions filled her head, with increasingly few answers. Her eyes were shut tight, she realized, as if to keep something out. Perhaps the water?  _But there was no water…_

She opened them to see a small light in a dark, vast space. Reaching to grasp it, it surrounded her, all her aches and pains receding along with her fear and confusion. She now felt only a strange, muted calm. Once this docility set in, a Great Crystal appeared before her, drowning her in a deep blue light.  _Like that of the ocean._

_**Hear. Feel. Think.** _

_……………………………………….._

The ground beneath her was hard, and uncomfortable. Twigs and rocks prodded her, and clung to her hair. Her clothes were damp and heavy, and her mind felt muddled. She began to stand, noting that she was on a forested shore some ways from the main body of water. Had she been carried by the current inland? She saw a spear lying next to her, and used it to support her unsteady legs. Deciding there was no reason to remain, she began to stumble toward the forest, seeing a path. 

A tall Elezen man in green and brown armor, face obscured by a mask, flagged her down as she entered.

“I had intended to check the shore for anything drifitin in the wake of that storm, but I certainly hadn’t expected to find ought but driftwood. You one of those adventurers? Taking a swim in the middle of a storm like that; you lot are dammed reckless. Unless you’re washed in from a ship? It’s quite a ways to have been carried, if so. You’re one lucky sod, regardless.”

“I… I don’t recall. I don’t recall anything prior to waking up”,  She stated matter-of-factly. It occurred to her that this fact perhaps ought to bother her, but somehow it did not.

The man, however, was quite concerned with her unnatural calm. _Perhaps the lass has a concussion._   Worried, he took her arm and hurried along the path toward the nearby Wood Wailer outpost. “Do you know your name then, at least? Might could find someone who knows you back in the city; the place is swarming with adventurers of late, and plenty of mooncats.. ah, sorry…  _Keepers_ , besides. Got a cart headed there soon actually”

She thought for a moment, a name bubbling to the surface of her mind. “A..era Hess”,  She said quietly, stumbling on the words that felt at once familiar and foreign.

“Era Hess, eh? Not the strangest Keeper name I’ve heard yet. Well miss Era, let’s get you on your way. Get ya a bite to eat too, while we’re at it. You look famished.”

"Thank you", she said, trying and failing to force some emotion into her voice. It still didn't sound right, she knew. The name he repeated to her too had sounded.. off, somehow, but she couldn’t be bothered to dispute it. Hells, she wasn't even certain it was _her_ name at all. 

He led her to a small camp where a wagon sat, two chocobos, two Hyur and two young Elezen resting. He handed her a bit of soup off the campfire, and spoke some words with one of the Hyur, who appeared to be the driver. He indicated she’d be welcome to ride along free of charge, seeing as she had no luggage to speak of and they were headed to Gridania anyway.

As she ate, she tried as best she could to dry the clothes she wore while still wearing them. She wasn't sure of what the underclothes were composed of, and though the thought of nudity didn't concern her presently, she was vaguely aware it might upset her present company. The two elezen youth, identical but plainly opposites, were eyeing her curiously, as if she were something unusual to be wary of.

Having sufficiently dried and her hunger sated, she boarded the craft and swiftly fell asleep, to dreams plagued by mysterious crystals and dark shadowy figures.

Little did she know that being plagued by mysterious crystals and dark shadowy figures would come to define her life from here on.

_**Hear. Feel. Think** _


	3. Memory

“You know, I’ve been meaning to thank you”

Cid and Era were aboard the Enterprise, on their way to pick up some last minute supplies needed for Operation Archon. The Grand Companies were stretched thin and so begged this favor of Cid. He requested Era come along, largely for the company. Some people found her quietness and limited expression unnerving, but having been in a similar, memory-less boat not so very long ago, Cid had never had any issue with her. In fact, he rather enjoyed it, as she was content to let him babble about whatever was on his mind at any given moment without much interruption, far past the point other people would have grown bored.

“For what?” she asked, turning to look at him as he flew the ship. He took no small amount of pride in the sparkle of awe present in her eyes whenever they flew together, and in the persistent sway of her tail that he had come to learn meant excitement (not that he had been _intentionally_  looking at her posterior, of course, however shapely). 

“For my memories. Without your help, I don’t know if I ever would have recovered them. Once Operation Archon is over, we ought to see about finding yours.”

“Oh” Era’s eyes darkened a bit, and her tail’s sway ceased. “You really needn’t thank me… I’m happy they’re back, of course, I wanted to help. But it wasn’t exactly intentional… I can’t control my Echo. If anything, I should apologize for prying”. 

Cid made a face, as if to say she was silly to think he would be bothered about ‘prying’. 

Era looked pensive. “I’ve been meaning to ask, actually… what it’s like…if you’re.. that is to say, if you feel.. are you the same, as you were?”

“You mean to ask, by remembering who I was, whether I'm also still Marques? Surely, you would be able to tell if that were not the case. Do I seem that much changed from when you first met me?”

“No! Not exactly, I just… well, I don’t know you half as well as you know yourself. So I wanted to hear your thoughts.”

Cid began to stroke his beard, thinking. “Hmm, I wouldn’t go that far. I certainly don’t feel all that different. The way I think never differed, though I suppose what naivete and uncertainty I had has since been replaced with the knowledge and experience I regained. But I think,” He said with a smirk, “that you’re not really asking for my benefit, are you? At least not entirely." 

"You want to know if  _you’ll_  be the same, if your memories return.” He looked toward her, still grinning, to see her ears pull back startled. She was rarely ever caught off guard, but when she was the results were always amusing to see. She'd even knocked something over with her tail once, as a result of some damn fool thing Alphinaud had said.

Era nodded, embarrassed. “I’m sorry, I suppose that was selfish of me. I just worry… you seem just as you were when we met, albeit less timid, but is that just a coincidence? That your core values, core self, are enhanced by your experiences, rather than repressed by them?” 

Her voice lowered to almost a whisper, as if fearful of the very ideas she was expressing “….Is it not possible that the events of my past could make me someone entirely contrary to who I am now? Would ‘I’ cease to be? The person I am now, to die, without any sort of gravestone, no place in the halls of the Twelve or anywhere for that matter, as my life is still occupied?” Her hands were grasping one another tightly enough to show white, and her tail had curled somewhat inward for the end to rest between her ankles.

Cid had never seen her so fearful, nor heard her talk so much so quickly, taking nary a breath in her effort to express her frustrations.

They were nearing their destination, so he set the ship to rest before answering.

“I suppose it is possible, to be sure. But not for you. I cannot imagine that you could be anyway other than you are. No one possessed of the amount of innate courage and goodness you have could be so changed. Furthermore, what of the person you used to be? Should she be left to die, as you say?”

He put a hand on her shoulder and shook his head. “That isn’t to say that there is anything wrong with the way you are. You cannot help your circumstances, and you certainly have no obligation to change them, but… from personal experience, I think it would be a good thing to recover your memory. You only stand to gain, not lose.”

Era nodded and smiled at this, plainly comforted by Cid’s words. “Then perhaps I will take you up on your offer of help. Whatever have I done to have so good a friend as you, Cid?”

“I should ask you the same. Now stop worrying and help me load these supplies before the Alliance takes the Castrum without us”, he laughed, and they set about their task.


	4. Love

"Do you really love them?"

"What?!", Thancred sputtered, nearly spilling the drink he'd bought to take his mind off the nightmare that was the last hour or three. Gods, how long had it taken to calm the catfighting women and shoo them, respectfully, from the Rising Stones? Yda was still over there in the corner, shooting glances at him and chuckling madly. And now Era too was to join the throng of jesters?

"Those ladies. Do you really love them all? There were so many..." Era looked incredulous, and Thancred had a _very_ strong suspicion she was misunderstanding the situation _entirely_. 

"What in the world makes you think I love them? I certainly enjoy different _aspects_ of each of those fine women, but _love_ is taking it a bit far..."

"Well, I just read.." Era started

"Again with the reading... _Sigh_ While I applaud your eagerness to fill in whatever gaps in your knowledge you encounter, there is something to be said for practical experience, you know. And where exactly did you acquire this tome? Some fairy tale of Urianger's?"

"Of course not, I know fairytails aren't realistic. I asked Yda..."

"There's your first mistake"

"I asked Yda following something she said about the matter, and she loaned me some books to read. The couples in those generally either already loved one another or professed it prior to... _activities_. Though they were always paired, not nearly so many ladies as were here earlier."

Era paused, brows furrowed, then continued, "Reading is all I can do, you know, for this. There isn't anyone... I haven't feelings for anyone like the people in the novels have for one another. I want to, I think. I want to feel that way about someone first...but when I do... chances are better than not that they will have experience and I obviously won't. I'll look a fool..."

Thancred looked at her for a while, concern in his eyes. This young woman read a great deal, both to discover what she didn't know and to learn to know it before it was apparent she hadn't. Generally, she didn't mention this fact, preferring to appear as if she had never been lacking in information to begin with. She hated unasked for advice. Hated being treated as anything less than an equal to the Archons around her. Her earlier question was asked only because Thancred understood this. He was perhaps the only fellow Scion she asked questions of on the regular. She trusted him to answer without any genuine belittlement. He teased her, they were like siblings at this point so teasing was inevitable, but there was never any strength to his jabs.

"Love isn't a requirement for these things unless you need it to be", Thancred began, "I don't, clearly, and my work would make it difficult to maintain such a relationship. If you think you do, then you do and should wait. If you want to read Yda's trashy romance novels, have at it. But don't read because you're afraid of looking foolish. Anyone who is worth your time is someone you shouldn't be afraid to look a fool in front of."

Era looked a bit surprised at this sudden seriousness from him, but then nodded. "Alright then. I'll be sure to love someone like that."

Era then smirked, a wicked gleam in her eyes."So those ladies then, they must really be worth your time, no?" 

"You!! Here I am, giving heartfelt counsel and you..." Thancred exclaimed, incensed. But Era had already gotten up from the bar, making hastily towards the door of the Rising Stones. Thancred proceeded to give chase all across Mor Dhona, intending to give the ungrateful Miqo'te a piece of his mind.

 


	5. Nameday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Haurchefant picks Era’s nameday for her.

**Nameday**

It was a brisk day at Camp Dragonhead. The skies were a deep blue, so rare in Coerthas nowadays. Yet, despite the beauty of the day, the lord of the camp and his two companions were regrettably confined indoors by so much paperwork.  
  
Era and Alphinaud had come to visit Lord Haurchefant both for the pleasure of his company and for a respite from the cool, unfriendly atmosphere of Ishgard’s city proper. Poor Haurchefant, ever dutiful, had been unable to join them outdoors while a mountain of paperwork remained on his desk, so, now quite familiar with the workings of the camp and of Ishgard, Era and Alphinaud had offered their help in getting it squared away.  
  
Halfway into their respective piles of papers, great cheering issued from across the camp, causing the trio to raise their heads from their stacks of forms and petitions.  
  
“Whatever could that be?”, Alphinaud inquired, losing interest in his task at a rate comparable to the increase of glee being expressed outside.  
  
Haurchefant grinned cheerily. “Ah, I would imagine that some of my soldiers are taking advantage of the good weather to celebrate. There are one or two namedays today, I believe. That reminds me, I must ensure the kitchen remembers to prepare cake, it would not do to have my knights to suffer without! The two of you simply must stay for dinner.”  
  
“If it’s really no imposition, I’d be happy to take you up on your offer. I can’t say I’ve ever had nameday cake before. Is it much different from a regular cake?” Era asked, a small, inquisitive smile upon her face.  
  
Haurchefant looked surprised. The Warrior of Light had never celebrated a nameday before?  
  
Seeing the Haurchefant’s bewilderment, Alphinaud explained, “Oh, has she not told you? With Era’s missing memory, we’ve no idea when her nameday is, nor even how many summers she’s lived. With no leads to follow to learn more of her past, we’d never had ability to celebrate it. Thancred had suggested we just pick a day, but before we could decide, this bloody Uldahn travesty scattered us all to the wind.” His and Era's expressions darkened a little at this, the wounds from recent events plainly still fresh.  
  
“I mentioned the extent of my amnesia, but it was some time ago, back when we were searching for the Enterprise. Really though, it’s no huge burden to not know. You all need not trouble yourselves on my account.”  Era said, in a flat voice, toneless to those unfamiliar with her, but full of fluster to those who knew her well enough to pair her voice with the increasing bushiness of her tail. She was rather unaccustomed to people fussing over her, as she knew Harchefant was certainly about to do. The over attention he always gave her caused a strange feeling in her stomach she couldn't quite name.  
  
“Nonsense!” Haurchefant exclaimed, “You could never be a trouble, and I cannot let this stand. If you’ll permit, I’d like to declare today as your honorary nameday, until such a time as we learn more.” He smiled so warmly, as he is wont to do, that Era could no more bring herself to deny him his wish than she could will her memory to return. Alphinaud laughed at this, unaccustomed as he was to seeing Era so off guard.  
  
She nodded, cheeks rather pink, and Haurchefant continued, happy as a clam.   
  
“Then it is settled! We shall have need of more cake, so if you’ll excuse me but a moment”, he said, turning to his attendants, “I will inform the kitchens. Pray, walk with me?”   
  
His attendants moved to protest, there was still much work to be done, but decided their lord had suffered the constraints of his paperwork long enough, and let the three enjoy the day and the promise of cake. The paperwork remained untouched for the rest of the day, much to his attendant's chagrin.

........................

The festivities that followed that night were perhaps the rowdiest that had ever taken place at Camp Dragonhead. There was an ungodly amount of cake and ale to be had, and just about every knight and soldier was acting a fool as a result. Era opted to abstain from the ale, despite Haurchefant's protests, but rather enjoyed the cake and everyone's good cheer. Haurchefant noted happily that Era's tail was swishing lazily back and forth, clearly glad of the party. Alphinaud, insisting he was an adult by Sharlyan standards, partook of the ale a little overmuch and slept slumped over at the far end of the table, a party hat dangling from one of his ears.

When finally they moved to retire, Haurchefant to his own chambers (sadly without the company of a certain oblivious Miqo'te) and Era and Alphinaud to the guest chambers, Era thanked Haurchefant.

"Haurchefant, this was not at all what I was expecting when I came to visit but... I'm immensely grateful. Truth be told, I really was unbothered by my lack of a nameday. It certainly isn't the oddest aspect of my situation, nor the most inconvenient. But, somehow... now that I have one, it has suddenly become as something precious. Perhaps it is because you chose it... one of my dearest friends." Era smiled only softly, but to someone as close to her as Haurchefant, that smile might as well have been the largest grin one could manage.

Haurchefant beamed at this, and exclaimed, "Ah, but it is my pleasure! That I have given you something precious by mere whimsy is one of the finest compliments I have ever received. And it should go without saying that you are always welcome to celebrate it here, even after you learn your true nameday. One can never have too much cake, no?"

......

After the end of the Dragonsong war, in the subsequent years to follow, Era continued to act on Haurchefant's invitation. Her namedays consisted of a visit to both the camp and to the Fortemps manor, where she would inevitably spend the night in a room they insisted was for guests but plainly belonged to her. In the evenings, after the main festivities had ended, she would package two slices of cake and travel to a small memorial overlooking Ishgard. One slice would be offered to her dear departed friend, and she would eat the other in what she wished were his company.


	6. A Missed Opportunity

Cid had messed up. He was currently sat by a rickety makeshift table at St.Conach's Find, supposedly reviewing, for the upteenth time, observational notes in the aftermath of his adventures in the Crystal Tower. In practice, however, he was doing anything but, thinking instead of missed opportunities and bungled conversations.

_"Say, would you care to go for a drink after this?"_

That's all he'd have had to say. Or dinner. Or even a walk. Anything, really, would have served to get the ball rolling. Instead, the words had died on his lips in favor of his usual hearty wave farewell.

He had no explanation for this; it should have been an easy thing to ask, given how close friends they are. Nerves? _Hells._ Was he really so frail of heart, that he could not even ask his bloody best friend to share a drink?

Cid couldn't pinpoint exactly when he'd begun to see the Warrior of Light in...well... a different light. He and she had been fast friends from near the moment she walked through the church doors, quite a feat, in retrospect, given how shy Marques had been. Which was just as well. Quiet and seemingly expressionless, she had unnerved everyone _but_ Marques and Father Iliud.

Their friendship only grew from there. Through all of their trials he was more than happy to stand at her side, brave and courageous as she was. Brave, strong, kind, generous... such qualities she had always posessed. But, of late, he noticed more and more of her positive qualities, less and less objectively.

Graceful, lovely. Her voice held his attention more than any other, and her form held his eyes. Her smiles unfailingly prompted his own. Had her ears always twitched like that as she spoke, her nose always wrinkled so as she laughed? Her eyes, the gentlest periwinkle, at times more blue and others more purple, and all times he'd love to inspect closer. The curve of her lips as she smiled...gods how he'd love nothing more to feel them for himself... _Ah, but now he is wandering into dangerous territory_.

She's yet his friend, and she deserves better than that.

Cid thought perhaps it was the end of Operation Archon that the seed of affection had taken root. At the time he'd believed it simply the battle high, the glow of victory, that had caused the light around her to change. But it never went away, after that. By the time they had started to investigate the Crystal Tower,  Cid realized it wasn't the light that had changed, simply _his_ view of her.

And so he had decided, yet failed to follow through, to ask her out. And unfortunately  he could not correct his mistake, as she had been called to aid someone for some menial nonsense the day after, and was scarce in Revenants Toll from then until the day she and the Scions were falsely accused of regicide. And now she was holed up in the most bloody inaccessible city in Eorzea.

"Chief!", a familiar voice called through his distracted thoughts. Turning to see Biggs making his way to where Cid sat, he spied a letter in the Roegdyn's hand.

"Jessie sent me. We've got a big job request she says you'll want to see to personally", Biggs grinned, handing the letter over.

It was from the Holy See of Ishgard, regarding an airship they just couldn't seem to get up and running. Definitely something he'd enjoy working on. A little sticky note written in Jessie's hand was attached at the bottom, almost covering the writer's seal. _Now you can stop all that moping, eh Chief?_ , the note read.

 

 


	7. Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Era deals poorly with grief.

The Warrior of Light was drunk, Cid observed.The way Thancred told it, she was well and truly sauced, positively plastered. While she hadn't had all that many drinks, the booze at the Forgotten Knight was strong stuff, and the intent behind Thancred's invitation _had_ been aimed at forgetting her ever mounting worries and pain, if only for a little while. 

 _"I hadn't expected her to actually agree"_ , Thancred had said as he enlisted Cid's aid in finding his uncommon drinking companion, who had slipped away whilst Thancred had gone to the loo. _"She always turned drinks down before. It would appear she handles them far more poorly than I anticipated"_. Thancred himself looked a pitiful mixture of tipsy and sheepish. While he would normally be the one to ask if someone needed locating, he didn't fully trust himself in his current state.

When they did find her, she was sat on a secluded bench in the Pillars, one strangely far from the main thoroughfare and positioned with a wall to its back, looking out on the near endless clouded vista that surrounded the city. She was shivering, woefully under dressed for Ishgardian nights in the snow, having left her coat at the inn. Wretched and pitiful, she looked now on the outside the way Cid had imagined she felt on the inside when he had asked after her earlier that day.

.....

Era had been spending quite a lot of time at the Skysteel Manufactury, helping Cid, Biggs, and Wedge with whatever she could, observing the things they made, or simply enjoying their company while reading some book or another. This in of itself had not seemed all that unusual to Cid, as she visited often anyway, until it occurred to him that she was now there _every day,_ without exception.

He saw that she spent as little time as possible around Alphinaud, Aymeric, and the entirety of the Fortemps household. "I can't face them", she explained after he pulled her aside to ask if she was alright. "Haurchefant is dead _because of me_ , and I can't face them".

Alphinaud saw her as some indomitable pillar of strength, and grew visibly uncomfortable to see her upset. She had to hide her pain from him.

Aymeric and Haurchefant had been friends. Surely Aymeric, though he'd never admit to as much, blamed her in his heart of hearts.

And gods, to sleep under the same roof he grew up under, to break bread with the very family that was now mourning because of her inattention, her weakness, her _failure._... She felt she had no right to the space they occupied, the air they breathed.

.....

She had been crying the day she and Cid met, back at Camp Drybone, the aftermath of the Scions' butchering too much to process, but those tears were far different from the ones on her face now. The tears then were slight and accompanied a look of utter confusion at their presence, for she had never in her admittedly short memory cried before that day. The tears she shed now wracked her with bitter sobs, her face blotchy and eyes a puffy, anguished red.

She sat with her knees pulled to her chest, arms drawn tight around them in a weak attempt to keep warm. Or perhaps it was simply to provide herself a modicum of comfort, for she refused the coat Thancred proffered.

"Alcohol didn't help at all, Thancred", she said in a quiet, oddly slow, uneven way, as if she were trying to keep herself coherent, full knowing the drink had turned her tongue to lead and her thoughts to haze. "I still feel it. Worse now, even. My chest...the pain won't go away. Consumes my every thought. Believed drinking would numb it... didn't, hoped the cold might...."

Her words drifted off, gaze tracking a hawk flying in the distance, distracted. Her mouth set in a firm line, downturned into a pained frown. Eyes turning toward Cid, Era refocused, face betraying futher shame.

"I'm terrible", she bemoaned, eyes welling with fresh tears, joining those busy freezing to her cheeks. "Absolutely terrible. Been using you. You and Biggs and Wedge...I don't think about it when I'm with you lot, you see. It's so _easy_ to be around you all...you didn't know him. Not well enough to... to...". Her words devolved to guilty sobs. Cid sat beside her, wrapping her in the coat Thancred brought, ignoring her protests, and enveloped her in a one armed hug, simultaneously trying to warm her up and retain some respect for her space.

"To blame you?" Thancred offered in a hushed, knowing tone, sitting on her free side, though he refrained from contact. "That's what you think, right, that they all blame you for it. They don't, of course, and you know so, but it's rather hard to continue to blame yourself without their ire to back it up, no?"

Her wince told him he was right on the money. And of course he was; who knew better than he the feeling of misplaced responsibility for the loss of a loved one, the feel of imagined blood on one's hands? His eyes, or rather visible eye, grew distant and wistful, looking through her rather than at. "And you need to blame someone, because you can't bring yourself to blame Haurchefant. Despite the fact it _was_ his fault, his choice..." He paused, a tad startled as Era lunged clumsily for him, teeth bared and eyes wild. _How **dare** he?!_

Cid held her back gently, but gave Thancred a look that plainly stated he didn't at all like where this conversation was going. He cleared his throat, taking over for his irreverent companion, "I think what our friend here means to say is that you had no sway over Ser Haurchefant's decision. He did what he chose to do, no more and no less. He deemed your safety paramount, and whether you feel you are worthy of his sacrifice or not, _he_ plainly thought you were worth protecting. You can't blame yourself. He never would have wanted that".

Whether Cid and Thancred's words had offered her any comfort could not be discerned, her anguish never leaving her face. Era ceased speaking entirely, however, and merely pulled the jacket more tightly around herself. _A smile better suits a hero, he had said, but what kind of hero was she?_   The thought haunted her, and she could meet no eyes.

Cid, who had now taken to running his hands up and down her arms, trying and failing to warm her enough to stop her shivering, decided they had lingered in the cold for quite long enough. "I'm sure Alphinaud and the rest are worried sick about you. Might we take you back to the manor, before you catch a cold?"

The question was merely a formality, however, as Cid had no intention of letting her do ought else but get somewhere warm, and saw it as a matter of urgency. Thancred too looked apprehensive at the state of her, seeing that she was undoubtedly already ill.

Not waiting for a response, and not receiving one beyond a small almost imperceptible nod, the pair attempted to help her to her feet. She stumbled badly, legs less than responsive in their state of inebriation and chill. Opting for haste, Cid picked Era up, carrying her princess fashion and covering her in her coat like a blanket.

This received a raised eyebrow from Thancred, who cursedly never seemed to miss a thing, prompting annoyed shake of the head from Cid. It wasn't what Thancred drunkenly assumed, wasn't _like that_ ; he merely wanted to get her home as quickly as possible, and her legs would not aid her well as she was.

_Well..._

Maybe it was a little bit _like that._ Just a smidge. But his motives were in no way ulterior; not now, not ever. On that level, he felt he understood the knight she mourned so strongly; with an odd sort of kinship borne of similar affections. He just wanted, first and foremost, to see her safe and happy. And at the moment, she was neither.

The trio made hastily toward the Fortemps Manor, Thancred and Cid listening to Era mutter weak, drunken apologies and responding with assurances that it was fine, she was no trouble. When the door guard, recognizing the Warrior of Light, asked about her besotten state, they simply said she'd had a tad too much to drink of unexpectedly strong ale. No mention was made of what it was that drove her to drink, for that was her own affair and no one else's.

Artoriel and Emmanelain wore ill concealed, frantic looks at the state of her as she was carried to her room to be tucked into bed by a positively befuddled and worried Alphinaud. Her fireplace was stoked to blazing by Honoroit, the sweet boy ever level headed and practical. Thancred, too tipsy to be of much use doing ought else, went to make  her tea. Tataru fussed with her blankets, adding layer after layer before cuddling up next to Era, her presence neither welcomed nor rejected by the now unresponsive Miqo'te.

A chirugeon was thankfully deemed unnecessary, due in large part to Cid's earlier precautions. At least two days bedrest were mandated by Count Edmont, however, ensuring she would become well despite herself. Though not a word on the subject had been uttered, 'twas plain on the Count's  face that he knew the reason for her ill advised actions, his own heart breaking alongside hers.

Before leaving her in the ample hands of the Scions and Fortemps family, Cid tried again to speak with Era, seeking still to console her. His attempts were largely fruitless, her only response being a quiet, heartfelt "thank you" issued from a face buried deep into its pillow. Her hand reached for his, and squeezed.

Time mends all wounds, and in time she would be better. But for the moment she dearly missed her friend, and drifted in and out of dreams where he yet lived.


	8. An Idle Fantasy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very bad dream for Aymeric, from an angst ask prompt on Tumblr.

The table was set, candles lit with a warm, cozy glow. Aymeric sat across from the Warrior of Light, Ishgard’s great hero. Aymeric’s fast friend. His heart’s desire.

Her radiance in the candlelight was comparable to that of the goddess Halone herself, a regal warrior despite her modest dinner attire. They were conversing cheerily, discussing the possibility of Aymeric’s joining her on an adventure. She declined the wine offered by his steward and soon they were alone, just the two of them basking in the glow.

_This is where we were interrupted, was it not?_

But no such interruption came this time, for this was Aymeric’s own dream, and he would see his warrior for far longer if possible. A guilty pleasure. Hold her here, in his mind’s eye, if he could not anywhere else.

The candlelight flickered.

This fantastical Era smirked at the notion, seemingly having heard his intent. The candlelight paled, the silver blue light of the moon outside now dominating the scene. A chill fell over the room.

“A funny thing, your mind, Ser Aymeric.” She took from him his own glass of wine, downing it in one gulp, setting it with force back upon the table in front of him. She stood, her vastly shorter frame towering over him in the cool light.

“You want to capture that which you can’t have. An idle fantasy, not uncommon and not ill intentioned. No, your dream is a sweet thing, for a sweet man. Or so it would be, if you had any _spine_.”

This cruel incarnation of Era, fair features twisted into a dark, heartless grin, circled the table as she spoke, examining objects about the room with detached interest.  
“I will never seek the comfort of your embrace, Aymeric. You know this, what good does it do to persist in these frivolities?”

Aymeric looked on in horror at this wretched impersonation he’d unwittingly conjured, unable to speak a word in his own defense.The _real_   Era would _never_ speak to him this way, not in a million years. Try as he might, he could not will himself awake, nor will her away. 

She scoffed at the attempt.  
“Are you going to _cry_ , brave ser knight?” With her index finger she pushed at an ornament on his mantle, sending it hurtling to the floor, shattering gracelessly.  
“Will you hunt down your wayward Dragoon, and plead with him to soothe your hurts? Knowing he, too, will never stay. Not for _you_.”  
“Will you weep onto Lucia’s shoulder, knowing she would never deny you? Knowing how she secretly desires you in turn? Will you break her heart to console your own?”

Aymeric could do naught but stare at the table, his fists clenched, knuckles white as snow. _So it was like this. Even his own heart was against him_. A myriad of doubts and insecurities plagued him, all of which brought a wicked smile to this demonic Era’s face.

“Hah! I hear the pathetic excuses that course through your mind. You think your ill birth, your bastard blood, the reason I will not suffer you? Fool, I care not for your lineage; I have known a bastard worthy of all the riches of the world. No, Aymeric, it is your own inadequacy that I detest. You’re weak! You could not even handle your aged father; your folly costing an _actually_ worthy man his very life!”

Not-Era rounded on him, gently running the back of her hand down his cheek, an act more painful to him than a slap to the face. She grabbed his chin, demanding he look at her.  
“You should have told me sooner, little lord. Captured my heart, my hand. _Before_ your failure. Now you’ve lost. More’s the pity. You poor poor thing, besotten with someone so far from your grasp you can’t hope to bear it. _However will you manage_?”

Aymeric awoke in a cold sweat at his desk, startled to the safety of wakefulness by an unannounced visitor. Estinien stood over him, having shaken him from sleep, a look of concern dominating his usually scowling features.  
Aymeric, quite uncharacteristically,  threw himself into the Dragoon’s arms, and blessedly was embraced in kind. Estinien, befuddled but no less understanding for it, simply held his distraught friend as he wept.


	9. Boredom

Nero had been sifting through quite possibly the most boring data ever to have been collected for hours now. How something as exciting as Omega could create things so monumentally dull was a mystery in and of itself, one Nero had not the energy to pursue. Looking for anything to entertain him, he turned to see what Cid and the Warrior of Light were up to.

_Ah_ , Cid was telling her another one of his patented dad jokes. And, per usual, the Warrior seemed to light up at this, ears perked, tail fluffed, and eyes sparkling. And therein lay the potential for Nero’s amusement. 

 

Once she had set off to deal with matters beyond the interdimensional rift, Nero sidled over to Cid’s station. 

"Not sure if you’ve noticed Garlond, but I do believe you’ve got a smitten kitten on your hands."

"Don’t call her that." Cid’s grin, which had persisted since speaking with the Warrior of Light, rapidly turned to a scowl.

"What, ‘smitten’ or ‘kitten’?"  Nero took a sip of tea.

"Either", Cid growled.His scowl was growing worse by the minute. 

"Well, it’s clear she’s at least the former, by the way she humors your abysmal ‘jokes’." Nero made a disgusted face, to emphasize his distaste.

"I can see that Nero, I have eyes", Cid said quietly, face slightly red, though whether from anger or embarrassment was unclear.

"Which means, then, that you persist in this affront to humor because you’re smitten in kind. What I’m getting at, Garlond, is that she’s smitten and you’re smitten and you’ve yet to do anything about it. Why?"

Cid eyed Nero warily, unsure what mockery lay at the end of this line of questioning. He debated dismissing the inquiry entirely and to resume sorting his own pile of data, but decided that he would have peace far sooner if he just gave the dhalmel-sized troll what it wanted. Nero merely smiled patiently.

_sigh_

"Firstly, because I don’t think she’s yet realized it herself, and I’ll not pressure her. Secondly, and most importantly, because I’m trying to focus on the task at hand so as to keep her alive. Everything else can wait til Omega is dealt with…. Why do you care anyway?"

"Oh, I certainly don’t. Merely curious. And bored."

"Well, find something else to cure your boredom. I’m not about to let your curiosity kill the cat."

_Aha! Seeing the chance to really raise Cid’s hackles, Nero’s eyes lit up behind his dark shades. He smirked, and struck._

"'Kill the cat'? How racially insensitive. I’m surprised at you, Garlond. Perhaps I shall tell her how you really see her when she returns."

"Wha… Godsdamnit Nero!! You know full well that’s not what I…"

But Nero had already begun to walk back to his station. Boredom alleviated and Cid thoroughly harassed, he was ready to resume sifting through data in an effort to, as Cid put it, prevent curiosity(be it his or that of a murderous robot) from killing the cat. Nero took another sip of tea, and set to work.


	10. Windows to the Heart (NSFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically the only lewd in this fic, inspiration and encouragement via Emet-Selch's Wholesomely Debauched Enabling Book Club <3  
> https://discord.gg/D7qF9RD

Era’s eyes were upon him.

Eyes he, in his deepest doubts, feared might never turn his way. Piercing periwinkle gaze, utterly unwavering, focused on naught but him. It was impossible for Cid to look elsewhere.

Her face bore little expression save what naturally accompanied her task, but he could hear (and _ feel _ ,  _ ooohhh gods... _ ) her enthusiasm in the soft hum of her throat. Tongue like molten silk, hands roaming his thighs with the gentlest caresses. Even with her mouth on him, the furthest thing from innocence, she attended her ministrations in a manner that could only be described as  _ reverent _ .  

He reached out, wishing to take hold of anything that might ground him in his bliss. His hips moved to find greater purchase in her, but were thwarted as she pinned them in place. 

Those satin soft hands ceased their affections only to grasp his own, forcing them to his sides, a light reprimand for attempting to alter her pace. Those transfixing eyes, igniting like wildfire, issued her demands:  _ Stay. _

She would take care of him, see him to the end. But in  _ her own _ time, no sooner.

It felt like nigh an eternity, that exacting pace his love set, but for her he would gladly suffer it and more.

And so she kept him there, teetering on the precipice, her loving gaze devouring his very heart and soul just as surely as her mouth devoured his cock. He fought to bear it, this purgatory she held him in, but he was  _ so _ damned close. She knew, oh gods she must, for he couldn’t but spy the faintest hint of a smirk, sparkling mirth like lightning in her eyes.

Closing them with a final hum, his dearest sent him over the edge.

……

“...lond.”

“...Garrrlond….”

“Having a spot of fun in your sleep? _ Really.  _ I’d have thought we were back at the academy. I wager people outside the rift could hear your damned groaning”

Cid started awake, realizing, with no small amount of disappointment, that he had been only dreaming. Fallen asleep at his terminal whilst sorting data from Omega. With Nero not 20 feet away, buried in his own pile of research. 

_ Fuck _

Cid moved to find a modicum of privacy in that blasted rift, desperately wishing to attend to the unpleasantly  _ abundant  _ mess he’d ended up with. Nero blessedly looked elsewhere, though Cid could not escape his cackling.  

“Tell me, was it that precious Warrior of yours that paid you a little visit? Hmm?” his insufferable voice called out.

 

“Oh, shut up Nero!”


	11. Just in Case

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set just before the first battle with Omega. Era has possessed feelings for Cid for some time, since Alexander even, but due to her amnesia and oblivious nature has neither the experience nor understanding needed to identify what these feelings are. He’s always been dear to her, since the day they met, but now somehow he had changed. It takes the genuine risk of death to make her realize what he is to her.

It was time. Finally, after Era had bested countless of his soulless simulacrums, Omega determined the only way to truly study the anomaly that was the Warrior of Light was to face her himself. Era knew his power, knew that without the device Cid had crafted for her, she would surely fail. For all her might, how could she alone hope to succeed where even the Father of Dragons had not?

But she was not alone, and Cid ensured she knew it. He labored to provide her with what strengths he possessed; to aid her in his way. Invention. She wasn’t blind to what pain crafting this device had caused him, she would see that it was worth it.

“Come back safe, you hear me?” He spoke in his usual manner, one that contained, simultaneously, unerring faith in her and irrepressible concern for her well being. 

“I always do. You know that. You make sure of that. Have I ever lost with you fighting alongside me?”

She would be fine. She was always fine, more or less. No more than light hurts, bumps, bruises, and more than a few emotional wounds have ever returned with her after a battle…and yet…

Her thoughts turned briefly to Haurchefant, as they often did before a battle. So strong, so brave. And all the same, he fell.

She _had_ had an inkling of his heart, but for all the saucy insinuations and offers of warmth, he had never truly told her his feelings. When he lay there, slipping away, she could see his regret in his eyes. Ultimately, with what little breath he had left he asked for what was most precious to him: her smile. _Yet she knew there was so much he would have said, given more time. What would she have said in kind?_

Her eyes returned to Cid’s and she finally understood what it was that had changed about him, what it was that made her eyes linger so when he smiled.  _He was to her the way she had been to Haurchefant._ And she would not risk the pain of regret, not when soon faced with such an insurmountable foe.

“I will be fine, but… just in case…”

She reached for him and, not knowing his heart, could only bring herself to give him a kiss on the cheek. But it was enough. Should the worst come, she would have no regrets. She had made _her_ heart known.

He looked at her in shock, as if unable to process this development, but as she stepped away and turned to accompany Alpha to Omega’s terrible stage, he reached for her arm, spun her to face him, and kissed her.

A proper kiss, not one restrained by fear of rejection. Soft, gentle at first, but with gradually increasing fervor, hands grasping shoulders and hair for desperate purchase. Era responded in kind, fervently, if a little clumsily, holding to him just as tightly. Cid kissed her as if he had been impatiently waiting for such a cue for ages. But neither party could bear to wait a moment longer.

Unfortunately for them, there were matters far more pressing.

A _kweh_ from Alpha broke them apart, embarrassed both. Cid sighed, face quite red, hands placed firmly on her shoulders, and looked deeply and sternly into her eyes.

“You had better come back. Safe and sound. I will be here, and aid you via the monitors. I mean it; I won’t be returning alone." He shrugged as she began to protest this.

"Hells, I doubt Omega would allow it anyhow. No use for _failed_ _experiments_ … The point is you will return. And... we will have a quite a few things to discuss when we get back to Rhalgar’s… yes?” He sounded hopeful, uncertain. His heart on his sleeve.

Era nodded, still rather dumbfounded, and placed her hand on his ungloved one,  squeezing lightly. A gentle reassurance, a promise to return. She knew he knew she meant it without her having to say a thing; Era preferred her actions speak for her.

After another impatient  _kweh,_ another warm smile, a tentative peck on the cheek, and a last “Godsspeed” from Cid, she at last set out to face their foe.

Omega could not hope to stand before them now.


	12. Just in Case (Cid's Perspective)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Cid's point of view. In the previous chapter I went for a general overview style, because that's kinda how Era processes things. Cid I imagine would be a bit more focused on the details of what's going on.

Cid always hated this part. Sending his invincible hero off to face yet another monstrosity. This time, too, her foe's freedom is largely his fault.  She, and everyone else it seems, would argue that unleashing Omega was a necessity. Era in particular would seek to share the blame for releasing it, or even try to shoulder the blame completely. 'If I had only stopped Ilberd in time', or some rot.

He was not sending her without aid, that's his consolation. She had the Omega Jammer (she had laughed at the name), which could exploit Omega's innate weakness. She also had him; he could observe the fight from the monitors and guide her. One saving grace of their past trials was that now, with all the readings he had studied and fights he had watched, he ( _and Nero_ , he supposed) was just about the only person who knew _exactly_ how strong Era is and what she could do.

He knew what hits she could take and what she could not, what defenses she could breach and what she would need help for. Her vast aether reserves and uncanny aether control served to greatly augment her physical strength on a subconscious level, despite her slender build. On a conscious level, she would use those reserves to cast red magic, a dilute form of both white and black magic ( _ought it not be grey magic, then?_ ). And she was bloody _clever_. She could spot any weakness, no matter how small. Her preternatural reflexes, due in part to the Echo she claimed, allowed her to use her skills to maximum effect with minimal need for defense. 

Part of his concern was that Omega had all of this information too. Only the Echo might go unaccounted for, unable to be seen and quantified in the readings. Thus, Cid was worried. He had every confidence in her, of course, but even she was not infallible.

“Come back safe, you hear me?” He stood no more than a fulm from her, looking her dead in the eye. 

Era smiled at him, “I always do. You know that. You make sure of that. Have I ever lost with you fighting alongside me?” Cid preened a little at this. It was true; whatever else they were or weren't, they made for an excellent team.

Era seemed lost in thought for a moment, brows furrowing, periwinkle eyes looking off to the distance. Her lips pursed, as if she were trying to make up her mind on something.

When her eyes met his once more, they were filled with a strange determination. 

“I will be fine, but… just in case…”

She reached for him, one hand on his arm and the other on his right cheek. On his left she gave him a short kiss, one that could be mistaken for a simple act of friendship were it not for how tightly her hand gripped his sleeve. He could feel heat rise to his face, molten where her lips touched his skin.

Cid was taken aback. He had suspected, hoped even, that she had begun to return his feelings, despite the fact he had kept his to himself as best he could out of respect. But somehow never imagined she would fully understand hers if she had them. Era was exceptionally bright and was far from immature, but there were certain areas (particularly emotional ones) where she was known to be entirely and _painfully_ oblivious.

Era took his shock poorly, mistaking it for offense. She turned away quickly to mask her disappointment, readying to leave for battle.

 _No, this isn't right. She can't leave like that. I..._   He reached for her arm, spun her back to face him (perhaps a little too roughly), and kissed her.

A gentle kiss, long and sweet, with growing intensity and _need_ , until he had to force himself to pull away. He had to, to avoid getting carried away. He _needed_ to see her expression, to see that she was _truly_ alright with this. Alright with him.

Era's eyes took on a wanting, hungry look he had never seen in her before. She kissed him back, one hand on his face and the other wrapped in his hair. It was plain that while she seemed to know _what_ to do, she had not actually done so before. Her clumsiness was easily made up for by fervor, however, and Cid certainly had no complaints. He'd have been more than happy to just keep kissing her forever, until they both were experts in the art, giant murder robot be dammed.

 _How long had he wanted this?_ He wrapped his arms more tightly around her, holding her as close as he could and deepening their kiss.

Alpha, _clearly_ unable to read the air, killed the mood with a terse _'Kweh!'._

Era pulled away quickly, as if snapping out of a trance, her face a furious shade of blush. He could feel a similar heat on his own cheeks. Cid sighed at his sudden misfortune, and begrudgingly returned his attention to the reason they were all here. Damned Omega. He placed his hands firmly on her shoulders, a part of him still wishing to pull her close again, and looked into the eyes that all of a sudden seemed to have quite a bit of trouble meeting his own.

When finally she could look at him, he spoke seriously, “You had better come back. Safe and sound. I will be here, and aid you via the monitors. I mean it; I won’t be returning alone."

Era made to protest, which  made his heart skip a little. He shrugged, brushing aside her concern.

"Hells, I doubt Omega would allow it anyhow. No use for _failed experiments_ after all… The point is you will return. And we will have a quite a few things to discuss when we get back to Rhalgar’s… yes?”

_Gods, how he hoped so._

Era nodded, still rather dumbfounded. She placed her hand on his ungloved one and squeezed. A gentle reassurance, a promise to return. He knew she meant it without her having to say; Era's actions had always spoken louder than her words. His lips and the spot where she had tugged his hair a bit too hard could now attest to that.

Alpha  _kweh'_ ed impatiently once more, jumping and flapping for emphasis. Era gave Cida warm smile and another tentative peck on the cheek.

Cid wished her his customary “Godsspeed”as she set off. He took up his place at the monitor, determined to see this fight through and Era back safe.

...........................

Alpha's perspective, the poor baby:

"Kweh? What the heck are they doing? Are they fighting? We have Omega to fight, there's no time for them to be fighting as well! _Kweh!_ Wait, now they're mad at me. What did I do?!


	13. Omega

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle with Omega, feat. Fray.

"Rocket Fists?! Really?!"

"Now is **not** the time to be impressed, Era!"

"Impressed isn't quite the word I'd use. What is it with mad scientists and hands?! Even Nero's got those stupid claws he made. I hate those things!" _shitty, stabby, awful claw hands_

"Fine, not impressed. Hit them with the Jammer, would you? Focus."

{Blip} SUBJECT ENGAGING IN BANTER TO LOWER STRESS LEVELS {Blip} INCREASING DAMAGE OUTPUT TO COMPENSATE

"Shite!" Era mentally prepared to dualcast some healing spells in the near future.

The fight had been going... well, smoothly wouldn't exactly be the right word. She wasn't dead yet, if that could be counted as smooth. Her attacks weren't hitting quite as hard as she'd like; red magic spells weren't terribly potent. Red magic makes use of internal aether which, granted, she has a lot of, and the user accelerates the spell to make a less-potent-but-happens-all-at-once spell.

Era, with her aether reserves, could pack a bit more punch in her spells then your run-of-the-mill redmage, but they still barely scratched Omega. Vermillion Thunder got the best result, but if she were to cast that all day she'd literally die, so she alternated. White magic, back magic, white magic, black magic (verthunder specifically), manafication, close the gap, embolden (as if she weren't bold enough already), and unleash the condensed magic within her sword. That's where the money was, the enchanted melee on a vulnerable spot created by the Thunder. 

It was like dancing. At least, that's how Cid always saw it. Dashing to and fro, dainty well-placed steps paired with lightning fast thrusts and slashes illuminated by the light of her spellcasting, and acrobatic flips to put distance between herself and danger once she'd dealt her damage. She'd even told him once that she practiced actual dances in order to improve her footwork. Against nimble opponents it was a sight to behold, Era able to easily keep pace with even the fastest of them. Omega was not a nimble opponent, however. It didn't **need** to be. Her dancing gave her no advantage here.

 _Rocket Fists...was her life really, legitimately being threatened by something so godsdamn silly?!_ Era used the Jammer on the fists, a bit of a hassle actually, what with her weapon of choice employing both hands. She wanted to try and combo with it again; hit Omega with a blast of the extremely powerful current then go in for an enchanted melee attack. It had worked once, but she knew with the time it took to take the Jammer from the belt she had it on and swap it out with the Focus in her left hand Omega would have figured out she intended to repeat the trick.

Dodge laser. Heal from Ballistic Impact. Dodge Larboard (or was it Starboard?). She had Cid just say left or right when he saw Omega ready the attack, after nearly getting hit for her lack of outdated navigational knowledge. She made a mental note to never, ever tell the Admiral lest she receive a lecture from the one of the scariest women she knew.

Cid was obviously on edge; Era could hear it in his voice, though if it had effected his ability to provide support she hadn't noticed. She wanted to eschew riskier maneuvers, if only for the benefit of his nerves, but this fight would not be won that way.

Omega must have grown bored of her efforts, as he retreated from the stage and summoned one of his 'level checkers' in his stead. _Dammed rude_. Era swiftly dismantled the hunk of junk before it could delete her with Force Quit.

Cid came in over linkshell "I've detected an extreme energy surge from Omega! Quickly, focus the Jammer's lightning in the center of the platform!"

Era did as she was bade and started charging the spot.

"That's it! Keep building energy in that spot! It should generate a rudimentary barrier". Though he attempted to be encouraging and enthusiastic, Cid sounded quite a bit frightened.

'Rudimentary' didn't sound all that reassuring, but she could tell Omega was preparing something truly awful, and that any amount of barrier would be a good amount of barrier. Era braced for impact, tuck pierced into the platform. 

It was awful. Even with the barrier, it was all she could do to keep from getting blown of the platform. The attack knocked her sword from her hand, causing it to roll to the very edge of the arena. Shit. _At least it didn't fall off_ , she mused, desperately hoping she wouldn't need to gather more materials for Gerolt to make a replacement. It had been bad enough the first time. Omega returned to the stage immediately after the cessation of his blast, leaving her no time to retrieve the blade. She had to resort to another tactic.

Cid looked on with growing concern until he saw a strange aether spike in Era's readings. No, aether wasn't exactly right... the sensors didn't seem to know what to call it. _Abyss_ kept popping up, but what in the seven hells was that?

From her outstretched hand, Era manifested a deep red and black great sword of condensed aether. A similar red aura began to surround her, and her aether began to concentrate in a barrier like manner throughout her whole body.

"Fray", she said quietly, "I can't heal myself with just a sword. A little backup?"

 _"And here I was thinking you wouldn't want loverboy to see your darkside",_ responded the shadow that separated from her form. It stood roughly a head taller than her; a heavily armored male physique. It carried a conjurers staff lazily at its side and was staring at Omega with something akin to mild disinterest. _"I suppose you are pretty well fucked without me, though I really don't understand why you bother asking. I am you, halfwit."_

{Blip} SUBJECT HAS DIVIDED THEIR AETHER TO COMPENSATE FOR HANDICAP {Blip} SIMULACRUM IS COMPOSED OF 90% SUBJECT'S AETHER AND 10% FOREIGN AETHER {Blip} FOREIGN AETHER APPEARS TO BE A COMPOSITE OF SUBJECT'S DECEASED ALLIES' AETHER

{Blip} PROBABILITY OF SUBJECT'S SUCCESS UNCHANGED

 _"We're inclined to disagree"_ Fray growled lazily, he and Era glaring at the robot with a ferocity that nearly made it reconsider its assessment.


	14. Butterflies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, while not like, totally safe for work, is only about as spicy as a salt shaker. It's the best I got in me, what can I say?

Era had a terrible case of the butterflies.

She always did when alone with Cid nowadays, every stolen private moment spent progressively more intimately. As it was, with her back pressed to the Excelsior's steering console and Cid pressed to her front, the butterflies in her stomach felt as if they were fit to fly from her body in an abrupt exodus. They were docked on a small secluded island somewhere in the Sea of Clouds, just about as private a place as one could wish for.

She and he were only kissing. But oh, how she loved to kiss him. The gentle starts, lips and noses barely touching, as if her permission were required for the slightest of contact. Permission she unfailingly granted, grabbing him by the collar of his coat to usher him closer, never missing the tiniest hint of pink that graced his cheeks. Because of her, the impossibly handsome, brilliant Cid Garlond was blushing, and _gods_ how that knowledge made her head spin, disregarding just how flushed he was making her own face turn. She hastened him past his starting caution every time, adamant that he need not hold back on her account, need not fuss and fret over if she was _ready_ for this or that.

She was not to be worried over so.

So she wished were true, yet each and every time their ungraceful dance of tongues began to become more frantic, every time hands began to roam and kisses wandered to ears and necks, she faltered.

The thrice damned metaphorical butterflies that took up residence in her abdomen would begin to dance at a fever pitch, leaving her feeling as if she were about to implode or explode, whichever was the more fitting resolution for this chaotic fluttering. And each time when it became too much, Era would place her hands over his mouth, to give herself a reprieve from the manic beat of those seemingly infinite wings. _Breathe._

Each and every time she assured him it wasn't his fault, and each and every time she kicked herself for being childish, for being....scared? Embarrassed? She couldn't even pin down the feeling that plagued her, let alone explain it to him properly. She _wanted_ this. _Wanted him!_ But her nerves would simply not allow it.

But she didn't have to, not after the first time. While regrettable, Cid never seemed to grow frustrated with her, always understanding and kind. He would pull her close, enveloping her in one of his patented bear hugs that lacked the electrical charge of their kisses, giving her a way to calm down. He could never force her, _would_ never force her. She would be ready when she was ready, he'd say.

This time, however, she resolved to be ready, butterflies be dammed. She'd requested this secluded locale when they had planned their date for a purpose, and she intended to see it put to use.

......

"Cid?", She near whispered, breaking their kiss to stop for breath. " Would you kiss my neck, like last time?" Her eyes met his shyly, her own question bringing heat to her cheeks. Cid looked a little surprised at this; that particular kind of kiss had panicked her faster than just about anything else they had done prior.

In spite of his apprehension, he managed to muster a cheeky little grin. "Always happy to oblige", he began, fingers beginning to undo the first couple buttons at her collar, "but you're sure?" he asked, the barest hint of worry in his eyes.

She nodded in the affirmative, and gave him another peck on the lips in reassurance. And that little reassurance was all he needed, so keen was he.

As requested, he leaned down to inflict a love mark at the junction of her neck and shoulder, where it would be hidden from view by her collar. It was a bit possessive, he knew, but the thought that she was marked as _his_ and his alone drove him wild, even if he was too much of a gentleman to put it where anyone might actually see. And as anticipated, Era froze up, both enjoying the feel of his tongue and lips on her skin and cowering from the swarm that erupted in her stomach.

But as he pulled back to observe his work, rather than remain frozen to that spot with eyes shut tight as she might usually do, Era powered through, emboldened by a singular thought: _the look of blush on his face._

Making use of her unnatural strength, she flipped their positions, with his back now pressed to the steering console (wisely locked). Savoring his surprise, her eyes roamed the vast expanse of exposed neck and chest made available to her by his wonderful coat, trying to pick her prey. Deciding on a spot just under his collarbone, near enough to his collar that it might feasibly be covered if his coat were fastened just a tad tighter, she placed much the same mark he had just given her. The butterflies fluttered madly as always, but the thought of how he must look kept her going.

 _Him_   flustered. Because of her. Because he's hers, and she's his, and they both now bore marks to prove it.

Drawing back to look at him, she found the sight was _everything_ she could have hoped for. His silver-blue eyes were wide with shock, the idea that she'd have it in her to reciprocate clearly not having crossed his mind, a dull crimson growing on his face as a result. He swallowed hard, breathing heavy. His response was gratifying, to say the least, and with it the butterflies calmed somewhat.

"That was...", Cid muttered, clearing his throat,"...since when?"  Cid couldn't remember a time he'd been quite this ruffled, but it was no mystery as to why. Era being so assertive was, to put it frankly, pretty godsdamn hot. It was similar to the feeling one he'd get watching her fight, but it was on a whole other level when directed _at_ him.

_Seven hells, he hadn't been ready for that._

Her bravado faded slightly as she started to explain, "Well, I... I thought that maybe the way I feel was akin to stage fright, you see. And people always say to imagine everyone naked to fix it, but seeing as imagining you naked is part of the problem, well...", She blushed furiously at the admission. "I thought the next best thing would be to take charge, somehow. To... well to bully you a bit, make _you_ the one with butterflies." Her tail was just about as fluffed as it could be, her deep crimson cheeks hidden behind shy hands.

"It worked. A...a bit, anyway. Enough, at least, to... continue." She peeked out from between her fingers, growing more and more mortified by the second.

At this, Cid began to laugh, eyes tearing up slightly. "Whatever gave you the idea you _didn't_ give me butterflies from the start?" His laughing continued as he watched bewilderment cross her face. Wiping at the corners of his eyes, he smiled at her, mischief and relief showing in his smile in equal measure.

"Now then, with this in mind, is imagining me naked still a problem?" His smirk was insufferable, but his eyes twinkled only with love.

As Era shook her head, Cid pulled her flush against him, _very_ grateful for the privacy of their surroundings. He had quite the hefty backlog of plans for her, you see. Her imagination would hardly be necessary.

 

 

 


	15. Butterflies Scattered (NSFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter made possible with help from Emet-Selch's Wholesomely Debauched and Enabling Book Club, letting me spitball my ideas and feedback. They're wonderful, and if you like writing or reading fic I'd encourage you to come say hi!  
> https://discord.gg/D7qF9RD

"I've made you wait so long, I think it's only fair you get to decide how we start."

"You've done nothing of the sort. You just needed time; I was never in any rush."

"You've still been waiting though, haven't you? Is there nothing you've been wanting to do? Nothing in particular, I mean? Any fantasies… or, or… you know." Era stammered, gesturing vaguely as if the action would account for words she wouldn't utter. "I'd like to do that first, really I would."

So she said, but Cid was of the opinion that bending her over the railing of the Excelsior and having his way might be just a tad bit too rough for Era's first time. So he went with his second favorite fantasy, one of the first he'd ever allowed himself of her, in fact.

"Well then, if you insist", he laughed, scooping her up and plopping her down on one of the ship's benches. She landed with an "eep!"; her eyes growing wide to see him kneel at her knees.  
"You want to do _that_?" She asked nervously, face flushing as he kissed his way up her thigh, his hands gently parting her hastily squeezed together legs. 

"Very, very much... but it can wait, if you're not comfortable…" Cid noted her furrowed brow and worrying lips.

"No, no, it's not... I want to try, I do… it's just… I can't return the favor." Era sighed, pointing to her teeth, specifically her canines, in response to his puzzled look."I've been practicing, on...on fruit and the like, but I can't seem to avoid damaging them with my teeth."

_She what?_

Cid struggled really, really hard not to laugh. _She had been practicing?_ He was flattered beyond words that she would bother with such a thing for him, truly. But the idea of her doing that to various foods was far too comical an image. Giggling lightly despite his best efforts, he said "My darling, I appreciate the concern but I assure you I'm rather more substantial than _fruit_."

She flushed to think of his _substantiality_. "Well, sure, I mean... you're certain I won't hurt you?"

"Short of outright biting me, no, I don't think you will."

"That's… genuinely a relief. I don't like this disparity between us, I really don't. I want to be able to make _you_ happy, Cid.  So no matter how silly or undignified it is, I wanted to at least make an effort."

"Era.." Damnit, how could he keep up his suave act in the face of something that genuine? Cid knew he was like putty in her hands, turning to mush at her heartfelt admissions. He leaned up to kiss her, hoping she could feel the love he bore for her as keenly as he did.  
"We could always try for a practical lesson later", he murmured against her lips. " _Without_ the fruit."

" _Cid~_ …" Heat radiated off her skin, his flirtations never failing to get a rise. 

 _At least I’m not the only one turning to mush_ , he thought.  
"Only teasing. Though the offer stands..."

She met his lips again to shut him up, clever tongue seeking entrance and being wholeheartedly welcomed. She had grown very adept at this of late, a quick study, kissing him senseless. For a few short moments their roles were reversed, Era holding all the cards, his heart in her hands.  
   
But that wouldn't do. Not for what Cid had planned.   
Her breath caught as his hands wandered back downwards, slipping underneath her skirt, fingertips coming to rest at the edge of her undergarments. Giving her a quick peck on the tip of her nose and a cheeky little grin, he followed his hands to his prize.   
He would leave the majority of her clothes on for now, while they were on the deck at least; the chill in the Sea of Clouds was fairly biting. He was pleasantly surprised to find she had not worn her customary undershorts, his only obstacle a pair of lovely blue lace pantalettes (clearly worn with him in mind), already quite damp. 

He smoothed his thumb back and forth across her waistband, savoring the feel of warm, soft lace on skin, smile only growing. She had no way of knowing this, of course, and he'd never admit to it, but the skirt she currently wore was the very one that originally inspired this fantasy. It had been the first time he'd seen her wear such a thing, her toned thighs the most glorious display.

"Ready?"

She nodded, hands coming to rest on his shoulders, eyes shut tight and face crimson. Cid, perhaps knowing her too well, mercifully did not leave her much time to stew in her shyness, deftly removing her undergarments and setting to work.

_Oh!_   
_Ohhhh gods..._

His tongue was on her now, moving slowly across her folds, every lap culminating in a little flick at her clit, each one sending what felt like sparks throughout her skin. Era tensed at these new sensations, fingers digging into his shoulders and legs attempting to squeeze shut, ultimately thwarted by his firm hold on her thighs. She could feel…. something building in her lower belly. Something warm, each spark further igniting it, her veins filled with fire. She knew what, of course, but never imagined it to feel... _anything_ quite like this.

_Seven hells…oh Cid..._

Her breath came out in small, stuttered gasps, uttering a muted moan as he found his pace, quickening as if in time with her racing heartbeat. It was so quiet she thought he might not have heard, thought (stupidly) that she might escape the sheer embarrassment of it. That is, until she felt him smile.

A hand flew to her mouth to stifle the noise, but her attempts at modesty were fruitless. Without looking up from his task, Cid merely raised one of his own hands in response. Holding it out as if requesting something, fingers waving in a "give it here" motion, he didn't need words to say what he wanted. Hesitantly, begrudgingly, Era placed her offending hand in his, the cacophony of quiet gasps and moans that escaped her now undampened.

_Heavens above and hells below, if this was him out of practice she couldn't begin to imagine what she was in for in the future._

Her hand grasped his tightly, the other fisting in his hair as she neared her peak. At least, she thought she must be, the tension in her belly growing stronger and stronger. Cid gave her thigh a little squeeze, a wordless "stay put, please". His touch left her for a moment, only to reappear at the entrance of her core. Gently he inserted a finger, crooking it juuuust so, making her back arch in pleasure. 

 _He's... trying to loosen it, right? I read about that..I read..ohhhh, I can't!_ She could feel herself teetering on the edge, an odd image of balancing on a brick wall coming to her mind. She was going to fall. _Needed_ to fall. But it was too soon, he needed to add more for it to work, didn't he? She had to hold on, to be patient, she had…  
"Cid, I'm sorry, please, I can't...I need... _ah_!!" Era came with a shudder, body curling around what of him she could reach, clinging to him.

 _Huh._ Her sudden release had caught him off guard, her cry and sharp tug of his hair startling him out of his reverie. So caught up in the act, he hadn't spotted the signs: how firmly she gripped his hand, the rising pitch of her voice, the thrashing of her tail. He hadn't expected Era to be quite so quiet, and assumed he had more time. _Not that it matters_ , he thought, admiring the worn out, blissful woman before him, her glow more than achievement enough.

She relinquished her hold on his hair, a couple strands staying with her, his scalp stinging a bit with the loss. As Cid kissed the inside of her thigh, Era dimly registered how... _damp_ his beard felt. _That's strange...wait...oh seven hells._ Cid issued a disappointed "tisk" as she buried her face in her hands. 

"There's so much, isn't there?" She cringed at the feel of the cool air on her damp skin. _Damp. Urgh_ ….

"Era, no, darling, it's fine." Cid hastily wiped at his mouth and beard, giving her a quick peck on the lips. "See?"

The flavor on his lips was odd, not at all like him. "Oh...do I really taste like that? It's... salty, sort of." 

"You taste fine, better than fine." He chuckled as she peeked out at him through her fingers, a little smile unmistakable.

"I ruined your master plan, Cid. Finished too soon, you only managed one finger before I…"

"My _plan_ , my overly self-conscious sweetheart, was to get you off. Having achieved that -- spectacularly, I might add -- I count nothing as ruined."

 _Oh you silly, awful, wonderful man_ , she thought, pulling him into a languid kiss, tongue dancing with his, her taste mingled with his own. "Thank you."

"' _Thank you_ '? For what?" Cid pulled a dumb face utterly ill befitting his genius.

"What? You know what!" She stuck her tongue out at him, his clueless, teasing facade cracking into an easy smile. "Oh no… Cid, the bench is such a _mess_ ", Era groaned, sitting up, again hiding her face in her hands. They hadn't thought to lay down a towel or anything.

"Ah, I wouldn't worry about it. Ever since her upgrade, the Excelsior's been overdue for a rechristening", he laughed. "This should serve".

"I'm not a bottle of wine!" Era chided, bapping him on the shoulder in embarrassment.

"Could have fooled me." Cid countered, waggling his eyebrows. "Now, the chill on deck does make what I have planned next rather difficult, what do you say we head below? While I must admit I'm _very_ keen to get you out of those clothes,  I'll not have you freeze in the process."

Era stood, wobbling slightly, steadying herself against his arm. Cid triggered the hatch release, and the pair descended from the chilly deck into the bowels of the Excelsior. Unlatching a portion of the wall, Cid revealed a small foldout cot. He kicked a number of crates and containers underneath it to aid the rather spindly supports, claiming the bed’s legs would not be up to the task.  
“Not the most comfortable thing in the world I suppose, but you’re the one that picked the Excelsior rather than a proper bed.” Not that Cid would want it any other way.

They set to removing their clothing, or the rest of it, in Era’s case, smalls long since cast aside. Era saw little point in retaining any articles, modesty all but tossed out the window given he’d already become so well acquainted with her most intimate parts, but Cid continued to wear his smalls, perhaps in a gesture to calm her nerves. He also wore his goggles still, which Era proceeded to yank off his head. _Damned goofy, to wear goggles during sex_ , she thought.

Cid was hardly restrained in his appreciation of her form, eyes wandering, drinking in each and every glorious curve. Era too, was guilty, though she tried to be rather more discreet in her admirations, eyes bashfully roaming his glorious musculature. Era adored in particular the fine, silver trail of hair that grew starting at Cid's navel, travelling downwards and downwards. She couldn't help it, it was fascinating.  
Perhaps it was the unfamiliarity of it, her own body hair, where there was any, being fine and sparse, the vast majority being on her head and tail. Or perhaps it was simply the implication; the thought of where the trail led, and the heat that arose in her loins in the thinking, that had her so enamored with this particular patch of hair.

He scooped her up, laying her on the cot with care, drawing her into an impassioned kiss, stealing her breath and leaving her woozy before moving to nibble at her ears.  
 _Okay, this is a good place to start._ They had done this before, albeit with more clothing. This was familiar, comfortable: passionate kisses, bodies pressed together, hands roaming faces and shoulders and hips and... _oh_.  Cid's fingers caressed the swell of her breast, Era letting out a little gasp of surprise. 

Of anticipation. 

Sensing no opposition, Cid continued, his palm enveloping it, massaging as his thumb began to stroke her now pebbled nipple. 

 _How heavenly, how...oooh._ A familiar want grew, stronger and stronger as he rolled her nipple between his fingers, ever more so as he took its companion in his mouth, his beard soft and smooth and ticklish on her skin. 

_More, please…_

As if he were suddenly a mind reader, Cid obliged, free hand finding her clit, small circles driving her wild. He was cognizant of her tells now, working her far more steadily as he dipped a finger inside. First only one, Era still too tense, still too tight, but so very wet. A second soon followed, crooking, hitting a spot that made her squirm, stars erupting behind her eyelids. He quite liked that reaction; Era could feel him grin against her chest as he repeated the move.

She tried to reach for him, barely thinking through her pleasure, fingers tentatively following the path of silver that led to him, wanting to do something, anything more than take. Cid groaned as she grasped him through his smalls, voice heady and deep, losing pace for a moment. Growing bolder, her hand slipped underneath his waistband, stroking the hardness she found there. Era hadn't the faintest idea what the hell she was doing, but surely it had to be something right, if his heavy breaths and muttered oaths were any indication. She hooked a finger underneath his chin, luring him to her, nibbling at his bottom lip.

She was close again, the pressure mounting, the tell-tale teetering feeling returning with force. Pleasure driving her to distraction, her hold on his manhood faltered, Era losing herself in his ministrations as Cid took her hand. But this, this wasn't how she wanted it. She wanted...

Era started to giggle, covering her mouth in an ill attempt to quell her sudden outburst. Cid looked up, his smile one part amused, one part confused, and one part a bit hurt. 

"Era, dear, if you're going to laugh, I do hope you'll tell me what about." He sounded a touch concerned. She patted at his arm reassuringly, wiping the corners of her eyes. 

"It's nothing, I just…. _hahaha_...I just had the most idiotic thought. As lovely as this is, I can't bear for you to stop. And at the same time, I _need_ for you to stop. Isn't that mad? It is, isn't it?"

"I think that depends on what you mean by ‘stop’. Have I done something? Are you uncomfortable?"

"No, no, no. I just...I want to move on. I need... I think I'm ready for the next bit."

Cid grinned deviously with understanding. "Oh? I'm not quite sure what you mean, love. 'Next bit?' I'm afraid you'll need to be a touch more specific."

"Must I? _Cid_ …. I would like to...no, that's too crass, I won't say that. I want…"

"Go on…" Cid was kissing a highly distracting path up her neck to the underside of her jaw, lavishing attention there with teeth and tongue. He shouldn't tease her so, but she really did make it all too easy.

 _"I want you to...to make love to me_." She muttered, shyly leaning away from his fervent affections, breathing heavy.

"Didn't catch that. A little louder, perhaps?" He was going to be in so much trouble later.

"Make love to me, dammit!" She griped, huffy and frustrated. Why must he bully her now?

Cid didn't mind in the slightest, enveloping her in his warm embrace. "As my lady commands", he laughed cheekily. "Perhaps it will be easier for you", he said, sitting up against the curved wall of the ship as best he could, "like this." Cid motioned her forward, pulling her onto his lap. "To give you more control of the pace. Then again, she's not exactly got the roomiest hull. You might bump your head…hmmm."

"If I'm careful", she murmured, leaning in close to kiss him just below his third eye, "it...it should be fine, probably. But I... I think I'd rather you be on top. If you're alright with that."

"Of course." Cid lay her gently down on the cot, hands making their way down her sides to rest at her hips, pulling them flush to his. He bit back a moan at the feel of her against him, wet and ready. 

"It's just... I'm a bit nervous, is all." Her heart was racing, pulse pounding at the feel of his length against her core, small rolls of his hips sending heat throughout, shivers following the path of his lips down her neck. "I...ah!...I can't... _mhmph_!"

Whatever it was she thought she couldn't do was lost as Cid claimed her lips, intent on drowning out her worries. If she wanted him to take care of her, he'd gladly do so; it was no failing on her part. Afterall, isn't that what she'd asked him to do?

Shy fingers trailed their way to the waistband of his smalls, pausing then tugging lightly. Cid broke their kiss, searching her eyes. "You're sure?" His voice was heavy with lust, undeniably eager to continue. But he had to be certain.

Era nodded, flushed but unashamed. "Please."

Removing them with haste, Cid lined himself up, Era bashfully looking anywhere but down at where they were joining. He kissed her once more, the ferocity easing her nervous mind as he entered.

He was much too large, surely. Or she was much too small. Era couldn't be sure which, and she couldn't bring herself to care with him kissing her so. There was no pain, thankfully his earnest preparations had seen to that, but Cid took her slowly all the same, giving her body a much needed moment to adjust to him. The stretch was the cause of some discomfort, unaccustomed as she was, but soon gave way to the oddest feeling. Fullness, warmth. With every ilm the feeling grew, and grew more pleasant for it. 

"Cid…" she panted, eyes half shut from the overflow of sensation.  
"Hmmm?" He had hilted, exercising as much restraint as he could muster waiting for her body to relax, his fingers digging into her hips from the effort.  
"I love you." She took his face in her hands, thumb caressing his lips. "So very much."  
"Era..." Words failed him. To be here, with her like this after all this time, he wasn't sure if he was more liable to sing or cry. Instead, he decided to show her. Love her in this way, that the depth of his feeling be undeniable. " _I love you_."

A tentative roll of Era's hips ushered him onward, starting with slow, intentional thrusts, mapping out her pleasure. Though she had little in the way of leverage in this position, Era rose to meet his every thrust admirably, greedy for the contact, savoring the feeling of renewed fullness with each stroke. She wanted so badly to kiss him, to be lost in him, but found it immeasurably difficult to take her eyes off of his beautiful face. He was a sight to behold, her beloved, awash with joy, powerful muscles flexing and glistening with the sheen of their mutual exertion. A curtain of silver shielded them from all the world as Cid rested his forehead on hers, third eye cooler to the touch than his searing skin.

Cid slipped his hand onto the small of her back, arching her ever closer into him, Era's breath catching as his touch grazed the base of her tail, said limb lashing about in answer. Stroking it, Cid found he could coax from her the most delightful whimpers, tenderly caressing the fine silken hairs to call forth even more of her lovely song.

Era, blessedly, was nearing her peak, hands fisting in his hair and clamoring at this back. Cid too, was struggling to hold on. It had been far too long since he had last done this, and she felt far too perfect around him, squeezing tighter and tighter as she neared release. He _refused_ to be first, reaching between them to work her most sensitive spot, leaving her gasping for air. By his touch she was undone, unraveling around him with a soft cry. He followed after her, oaths muttered into the crook of her neck, having resisted longer than he could bear, spilling over into his love. 

Spilling.

And spilling.

… _on second thought, he probably should have warned her_...

Spent, they separated, fighting for air, basking in the afterglow. Their hands met, holding fast as they came down together. Looking over at Cid, Era thought he looked strangely... sheepish.  
"Era", he panted, "don't look down. It's nothing bad, there's just, there's a lot of… just let me get you cleaned up." 

 _A lot of what_? She wondered, a odd trickling sensation answering her. _Oh_ …

Cid rose from the cot wearily, utterly exhausted, rummaging through a nearby storage crate for a couple clean cloths and towels.

"No, I can do it _myself_ , really, just hand me the towel!" She squeaked. She hadn't braved a look, but it was beginning to cool and she could _feel_ it.  
They cleaned up in an abashed silence, Cid helpfully passing her another cloth when one proved insufficient.

"Cid?"

"Yes?"

"Is it always like this?"

"What? Ah... yes. Usually. Unless I've been.....Yes." His cheeks and ears were rather pink now. He nearly... there were some activities he'd prefer to keep to himself for the moment.

"Then I don't mind the mess."

"Oh?"

"It felt nice, frankly. It's a part of you. Also you're blushing."

"Am not." He was.

" _Are_." A mischievous grin spread across her face, as if it hadn't been she who was the blushing, stuttering mess not moments ago. "Do you think Vanu or Bismark or Sky Pirates will find us in the next bell or so?"

"I shouldn't think so, why?"

"I'd quite like a nap, if you'll join me." She patted at the cot beneath her, a towel laid over the worst of the wet spots.

"Good gods, a nap would be heavenly." He flopped down heavily beside her with a huff, pulling her onto his chest, promptly falling asleep. Era laughed, soon to follow.

 


	16. Breakfast

“How is it you can’t cook?”

“I can too cook”, Cid chided, mock offense on his sleepy face.

“Tea and toast is not cooking, love”, Era retorted, deftly flipping two separate pans of pancakes, then moving to chop vegetables for an omelette at lightning speed. She had been experimenting with different pet names lately, none of which ever sounded anything but odd.  _They're always so much nicer coming from Cid_ , she thought. He chuckled at the sound of it, and she threw ‘Love’ into the mental trashcan of failed attempts. 

“Perhaps not to a Bismark trained chef, but to us mere mortals…”

“Greatest engineer in Eorzea, a mere mortal?” She raised an eyebrow. “At any rate, this was  _supposed_ to be breakfast in bed. Won’t you go back to sleep for a bit? You look like you could use it.”

“I’m not tired in the slightest”, Cid claimed, the dark circles under his eyes betraying him. In truth, he had a hard time staying asleep once she was up. Era hadn’t any room to talk, though, as she was the same way. How many times had he awoken in the middle of the night with some new idea for an airship part, shield generator, toaster, etc., only to return to find her with a table lamp on reading a book?

 _Perhaps it’s the balance of the mattress_ , he mused, reaching for a slice of bacon and promptly getting slapped with a spatula. He used to sleep in the center, before the bed had, though neither could pinpoint precisely when, been split into ‘his side’ and ‘her side’. Even when she didn’t stay over, he naturally defaulted to his side. It just felt right. That must be it, now that he thought about it. He couldn’t sleep very well when she was away either.

“Fine then, Mr. Liar”, she grinned, pressing a little kiss to the slapped hand. “Make the tea and the toast and this’ll all be just about done. Then we can enjoy it together”.

“I can think of a few things we can enjoy together, since we’re already up”, He said, waggling his eyebrows and receiving another, more playful slap.


	17. Limbo (NSFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written with the dastardly encouragement of the delightfully thirsty people over at Emet-Selch's Wholesomely Debauched and Enabling Book Club <3  
> https://discord.gg/D7qF9RD

"Tonight I’d like to try a little something new,” Cid murmured at Era’s ear, the pair making fast work of removing what clothes had managed to stay on as they fumbled their way toward the bed.

“Oh?”  He had been eyeing her all through dinner, smiling to himself at some idea or another. Naturally, Era was more than a little curious about what he had planned. He certainly had a very inventive mind.

“You’ll see”, he chuckled lightly, “Just relax”. He scooped her up, laying her against a number of pillows, propping her slightly and making himself comfortable at her side. “Trust me?” He grinned roguishly, making a little show of fluffing the pillows behind her.

“And what sort of a question is that?” She gave him a playful shove, laughing and sticking her tongue out at him. Cid took her teasing as an offer, swooping in for a smooch, his own tongue thoroughly flustering his love, stealing the breath from her lungs.

“An important one”, he panted, coming up for air. “If at any point you want me to stop….” he started, cut off as Era dragged him down into another frenzied kiss.

“If it’s for you”, She spoke breathlessly between kisses, pausing to spread the love across his neck as well, ”I'm sure I can handle it. Whatever it is." A wanting, desperate look crossed her face, her fingers tracing delicate patterns on his skin. " _Please_.” 

Cid uttered a husky groan at this, emboldened with desire and permission. Wrapping her tight in his embrace, he began nibbling at her ears, a hand moving to palm her breast, the thumb caressing her nipple sending sparks throughout her skin. Era could feel the length of him throb against her thigh as he pressed closer, the space between them useless and unwanted. She reached for him, aiming to give as much as received, thwarted when he took her hand in his, resting it on the back of his neck. A command in the warm silver pools of his eyes, issued without words, _relax, and allow me_.

His mouth rarely left hers, drinking in her moans and sighs, nary a one above a whisper, as was her custom. He roamed only to lavish attention on her ears, her very weakest points, leaving her trembling and aching for more. A man of his keen eyes and keener intellect could never fail to learn how his lover ticks, what makes her shiver and gasp his name.  And Cid always employed this knowledge to great effect, taking immense pride in how blissful she looked, at how quickly the Warrior of Light fell apart in his arms. 

His expert fingers dipped in and out of her core with deft purpose, first one, then two, his thumb circling her most sensitive spot. It didn't take long. It never did. Her shy oaths, the flush of her face, the graceful arch of her back, all pointed to one thing: she was close. Hiding a smirk by burying his face in her hair, Cid did something quite uncharacteristic of himself.   
 _He stopped._    
Withdrew his lust dampened fingers, hand instead making to caress her thighs. He fought back a chuckle at her confused whine, quelling her complaints with sweet kisses. 

He lingered, drawing patterns up and down her leg, until her breathing evened, Era slipping back from the precipice. But before her embers could grow cold, he once again took up his task, driving her to pleasure with relish. Era breathed a sigh of blessed relief, thinking his lapse momentary. To Era's great dismay, however, he again denied her. And denied her. And denied her! Once, twice, a third time, till she clawed at his back and bit at his lips in frustration. _Whatever was he playing at?!_

Era had never felt so tightly wound, the sensation nearing, though never quite crossing over into, the point of discomfort. She felt fit to burst, and simply couldn’t conceive of why he would tease her so. There was no mischief in his eyes that could offer explanation; he gazed at her only with a calm, knowing sort of love. He placed a kiss to her brow as she drew close once more, his touch drifting elsewhere _juuust_ before she found relief.  

“ _Cid~_ ” Era gasped, but no sooner had she drawn breath to say more than she was silenced, Cid pulling her into an impassioned kiss. He continued to work her torturously slowly, bringing her to the edge only to fall back again, free hand busying itself with soothing caresses at the base of her skull. The feel of his fingers combing through her hair served to counter the ever mounting tension, but only just enough to bear it. _It’s not begging or pleas he wants_ , she realized. 

He had said it, hadn't he? 'Trust me'? He simply wanted her faith, in him, in his intentions. That was all.

“Once more”, he whispered, warm breath tickling the fine hairs of her ear, sending a shiver down her spine. His breathing was erratic, Cid very nearly as affected as she. 

Doubling down on his fingers' ministrations, Cid began to restoke her fire back to blazing. Era grasped at his back and shoulders, frantically settling for a fistful of hair as a means of grounding and purchase. White hot tension again coiled in her core, and it was all she could do to hold on, face nestled into his neck to mask her dulcet moans. Cid leaned in and, carefully taking an ear between his teeth, set her alight. She came with a shout, clutching him for dear life.

She must have fractured into a million, million pieces, the way euphoria coursed through her. Cid held her tight, peppering kisses across her face and neck, strong, gentle fingers continuing their good works till she could stand no more. Her hazy bliss took what must have been an eternity to fade, feeling as if she were somewhere among the clouds. She whimpered softly into the crook of his neck, clinging to him as she floated slowly back down to the earth.

Cid sighed as if it were he, rather than Era, that had been on the receiving end of such delightful torture. Beaming at the state of her, he nuzzled her nose with his own, leaning in for yet another languid, contented kiss. “Alright, my love?” he laughed, the answer more than apparent.

Their foreheads met, and Era couldn't but giggle at the silliness of what just transpired. By all rights what he had just done to her should be tantamount to bullying, tossing her back and forth like so many waves. In spite of this, to her surprise she found she couldn't help but want him to do it again! And again, and... _well_. At least, once she regained some feeling in her limbs, which were near as heavy as lead.

"What in the world possessed you to do that?" She gasped, smiling softly, stroking her favorite, particularly soft patch of beard.

"Curiosity, in a word. It occurred to me that I've not heard you loud before, and though I must say I quite _like_ the way you whisper my name, I wanted to see if there was ought that could make you do otherwise."

"Oh? And is your curiosity sated?" Era's tail swished lazily behind her, body the picture of postcoital relaxation. Cid thought to himself he'd done a rather good job.

"Mmmhmm," Cid affirmed, trailing ticklish kisses up her arm. "For the moment."

"Will it work on you too, I wonder?" Era mused, a well intentioned scheme forming between her ears. 

"Well, there's certainly one way to find out", Cid offered, brushing tousled hair from her face. "That is, if you're up to it."

Though still wobbly and out of breath, Era couldn't help but rise to a challenge. "One way to find out", she echoed, shoving him (not unkindly) down to the spot she previously lay.


	18. How Dare!?

" **Who are you! Where am I, and why am I NAKED**?!!!"

The Exarch had fucked up again. This time surely he would get it right, _surely_ would bring the Warrior of Light to the First. Or so he had thought but, as with the previous four attempts, he had summoned a friend instead. A very, **very** cross friend.

"Look at me when I'm yelling at you, you bastard!!" Shouted the irate young Elf (oops, _Elezen_ ),ripping the robe he offered from his outstretched hand as he looked anywhere _but_ at the nude youth.

"If you'll just allow me to explai...", G'raha attempted, to no avail.

"Where is the Warrior of Light? Where is Era!!? She was with me, we were on a battlefield. Oh gods, whatever is she going to think?! I've left her!!" Alisaie cradled her head in her hands, quite distraught.

"Actually, it was her I was trying to..."

"I made her promise! Promise not to leave me alone, and here I am in the middle of some bloody castle or whatever while she's probably lying in the dirt wondering what became of me! This is all your fault, you....!!"

The Exarch was truly at the end of his patience. None. **None** of the others were half so belligerent when they arrived. He could bear it no longer. " _Can you shut up for five minutes, please_??!!”

 _Oh. Oh no._ G'raha realized the sheer folly of that statement as Alisaie rounded on him, a murderous gleam in her eye. He had to get out of this now, before he wound up on the wrong end of a fireball. Perhaps he ought to have her brother explain, it would be far safer. "Vanish!"

"Hey! Where'd you go?! Get back here you arse!!"


	19. Questions Upon Questions

"If your aim is to kill me by boring a hole through my head with your gaze, I can assure you it will not work", drawled the entirely unenthused voice of Emet-Selch, the group's resident unwelcome Ascian.

Era startled. She hadn't actually been looking at him, rather staring off into the distance that so happened to be his general direction. Though, admittedly it was a stray thought regarding the Ascian that spurred her distracted musing.

"Sorry, I wasn't trying to...I wasn't looking at you." She shook her head frustratedly, having lost her train of thought.

"Oh, something of interest behind me then?" he turned to look, full knowing there was nothing of the sort. For a person claiming to want cooperation, his attitude left quite a lot to be desired, Era thought. "Ah, nothing but trees, trees, and ...what's that? More _trees_ ".  His sheer boredom was evident. The group had been resting in Fanow prior to exploring the Qitania Ravel, and he had made it quite plain that nothing could be more dull than their conversation.

"No, I was just thinking..."

"An activity you partake in? Color me surprised"

"Do you have to be so rude?! I was thinking that I recognized you from somewhere, but now I rather hope that is not the case!" That he could get such a rise out of her had her troubled. Era was not the hot headed type.

"Surely you'd know if you did... ah, but you're amnesiac, aren't you?"

"Been spying on my conversations with Minfilia then?"

"Of course." He gave her a pointed look. What _else_ would he have been doing? 

"As your friend pointed out upon our first meeting, anyone who's read a book will have seen my face. You can read, can't you?" Era glared at him, causing him to smirk. _This was fun._ He continued, "Or perhaps you were a conscript. I believe they're all given some education in Garlean history." He shrugged. Not that any of that was his concern anymore.

"Cid already thought of that, since I knew how to pilot a magitech armor. But I didn't know the salute, so it's pretty unlikely. I didn't forget _how_   to do things, just how I learned them. Besides, it's not your face that seems familiar. Your voice? No.. it's not that either..." She rested her chin on her knuckles, thinking. 

"If you cannot discern how I am familiar, would it not stand to reason that you're simply imagining it? I'm quite certain I've never seen you before." _Not like this, anyway._ His eyes narrowed.

"I'm not! But... bah, it's no use. You're less than helpful, you know that?" She shook her head, and made to walk away to somewhere less full of ego and pretension. Gods, this man made her so angry, and she had no idea why. She'd always been able to brush off snide comments, a benefit of her dulled emotional responses. Yet with him it felt as if they argued like this whenever they spoke, which made no sense at all seeing as they had rarely had any sort of prolonged conversation. **"You've always been like this, you...!"** She began, words spilling from her mouth unbidden, raising her voice but stopping abruptly, doubling over in pain as she clutched at her forehead, a sharp headache feeling as if it would split her skull wide.

With a snap of his fingers, he rendered her unconscious, fast asleep. Whatever the cause of her sudden pains, it would not do for her companions to see her in such a state around him, lest he lose their newfound, _highly_   tentative trust.  He caught her as she collapsed, propping her up against a wall as if she had been set upon by a sudden urge for a nap.

 _Had this pitiful, tattered mockery of **Her** truly begun to remember? _They always seemed to recognize him somewhat, but never before had one _quoted_ **Her**....Would that it had been a more pleasant quote... No. Surely it had just been a coincidence. Her soul was nowhere near complete. If she could contain the light of all five lightwardens, then perhaps he could believe it.

Did he dare to hope?

 


	20. Shoebill

The Scions and their vaunted Warrior of Light were fast asleep in a small village near the foot of Mt. Gulg, exhausted from their efforts to arrange the construction of a gigantic talos.

The Warrior's sleep seemed increasingly fitful; there was no rest to be found there. A strange bird looked on with apparent interest, all the more strange for it. The shoebill padded over to the Warrior, as if to inspect the source of the issue.  
...................  
Era was in a dimly lit workshop, overlooking an exhausted Cid Garlond. He seemed older, his naturally white hair taking on a greyer tone, tired face far more creased than she remembered, though no less handsome.

He was pouring over countless tomes and notebooks, his hands fiddling with some object that appeared Omegan in design. Around his neck alongside his usual pendant he wore a thin chain that bore two rings, one far too small for his hands. _One intended for her._

He could not see her, which was just as well, for tears had begun to fall from her eyes at the scene. This was no dream, Era knew what it felt like to see via the Echo, and this was it. This was the other Cid; the Cid who lived and died trying to bring her back. The Cid who, even should they succeed in saving the First, would never see her again.

The Echo told her all of this, and her heart weighed more heavily for it.

He was muttering to himself, alone in the workshop as he was, "The last examination of Alexander proved to be a failure. If it weren't for that damnable barrier... If only we'd nicked more things while we were there originally. The tower, Alexander, Omega, each and every thing I need is so bloody out of reach!"

He placed his head in his hands and breathed heavily, as if fighting back the very same tears that were now streaming down Era's face. She reached for him, pointless though she knew the gesture to be, but before she could...  
...................  
Era jolted awake, eyes wet. A large, terrifying bird was staring her in the face, one foot on her thigh. She nearly jumped out of her skin at this; gods how she hated how this thing followed them around. Why was it here, staring her down as if she owed it money!?

Thancred and Ryne stirred nearby at the sudden noise, though did not wake. Needing space, needing air, she rose and made to leave the small hut they had taken up temporary residence in. The cursed bird followed her, eyes unwavering. _Gods why?_

She stopped some ways from the town, at a spot overlooking the Bright Cliff. She could see the lights of Eulmore in the distance, glowing with vibrant obstinance in the face of recent events. The shoebill hopped onto a nearby rock, so it could continue to stare at her face unhindered.

She stared back, growing more and more annoyed at the thing. Why in the seven hells was this thing always watching....!

_It likes to watch._

Her brows furrowed at the realization of the bird's likely identity, though she didn't speak it for fear of being wrong and later mocked: _"You really thought I'd deign to disguise myself as a bird? To watch **you**? How conceited, Hero.." _

Well, bird or ascian, if it intended to intrude on her privacy, it might as well serve as a sounding board.

"I had a dream. A nightmare. Of the future that will come to pass should I fail. I...Someone very dear to me was suffering greatly because of that failure.

I've always been the one to lose people, to miss people. I'm always so quick to throw myself upon the sword so I won't have to lose anyone else... I'd never really considered the impact it would have on others should they lose _me_. If I fail, he will suffer. I can't fail, I can't, I won't. But it makes me think, how many people would feel that loss? How many people did I hurt?"

The bird continued to stare, as was its wont, but something in its eyes seemed to change. Era had no experience discerning the emotions of birds, but the echo told her that her words had unsettled it. 

She patted its head, feeling rather as if she had won something in catching the creepy thing off guard. "You're a good bird", she said, as if to reassure a pet. Feeling lighter for the fresh air and the one-sided conversation, she made to return to the town. For the first time in a long while, the bird did not follow.


	21. Incomplete

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for the end of Shadowbringers. Really, don't read if you're not current and care about getting spoiled. It's legit part of the biggest reveal of the expac...
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Once again, Era found herself resting atop of one of the taller buildings, overlooking the mock city.

Amaurot.

More and more often of late she wound up here, floating to one high vantage point or another on her Demi-Ozma. The magics had not yet faded. Perhaps it would be any moment now, making her current idleness incredibly wasteful. Perhaps they never would; she had little enough knowledge of how it worked.

Before she could cease her visits, before the magics fade and the seas return (had it all actually been underwater before they visited with Bismark?), she had to glean what she could from the inhabitants. To keep her promise to remember, for how could you remember that which you know naught of? To learn what secrets could be found here alone.

The "residents" of the city did not see fit to give her much information on the matter, whether because they thought she was a child or because they simply were't complex enough shades to posses much knowledge to begin with. This is perhaps the worst detail of the city; the infuriating lack of answers.

There was one person she would like to ask, but he was quite dead now. She hadn't wanted to kill him, despite the obvious necessity and his  _incredibly_  grating personality, she hadn't hated him. But he had forced her hand. Harmed her friends. Intended to kill them all for their insolence. He would not yield, furious, mad with grief, and tempered besides. And so she did away with likely the only person who had the information she wanted.

Needed.

Elidibus might know as well, but he was not like to be very forthcoming, given the circumstances. Emet-Selch had been a bit of an anomaly in that regard, always bluntly and honestly, though exasperatedly, responding to her incessant badgering. Originally she had hoped to catch him in a lie, but there never were any.

The rest of the Scions did not approve of her frequent forays into the city. They didn't understand why she went, to keep a promise was one thing, that they could fathom, but she couldn't explain to them in any way they could relate to the true reason she was here.

She went covertly now, for fear they would find way to tell Cid of her actions. The last thing he needed was another person in his life with an obsession. He, of all people, might understand why she was here, but she couldn't bring herself to regale him with yet another oddity of her existence. Being Warrior of Light was bad enough, not to mention her personified emotions in Fray and Myste.

He took everything, the impossible adventures, the uncanny powers, the resolutely missing memories, all of it, in stride. But she was always terrified that something would be the last straw. Something beyond what he could accept. That he would finally distance himself from her, and all the trouble she brought.

When she had first arrived to rescue G'raha, she felt very little for the place, aside from a strange sadness. It was quite somber in its beauty, perhaps due to the locale. It's rather gloomy under the sea after all. It wasn't until she and Ardbert had reconciled their shattered soul that the place had begun to feel...nostalgic. She had been somebody from here, that much was plain.

The 'citizens' recognized her often, though would brush it off quickly and refuse to return to the subject if pressed. Emet-Selch too had made odd comments in passing, as if she reminded him of someone.

The most damning evidence however was the frank conversation with the shade of Hythlodaeus, an uncommonly astute and self aware shade mistakenly formed. He must have been too complex to function further upon the death of his summoner, however, as Era had not seen him since.

He had seen her soul, and Ardbert's, and joked that this  _would_  be the sort of fate her former self would have and that Emet-Selch surely must have taken notice. She had been someone he knew, though aside from this tidbit of information she had nothing. No further information about this person she was supposed to have been: who they were, what they were like, why such an odd fate fit her so well...

It's a strange thing, to regain something you never knew you lacked. She had lived her life happily, unaware that she wanted for such parts of herself. Being from the source, she had likely been born seven parts whole, the part native to the source, and the six rejoined during the calamities. Presumably the seventh returned some of her soul as well, but she lacked any memory of the calamity or times before with which to judge. When the ninth part, Ardbert, had returned to her the difference was as night and day.

It is neigh impossible to accurately describe the sensation. One minute you're you, the next you're just...  **infinitely** more  _you_.

She had many and more questions, and little by way of answers. How many more fragments were there? How many other lives was 'she' living on various shards? Was there a fragment for each shard, or only some? Was one lost to the void of the 13th, never to be regained?

 _Ah, but they won't be regained regardless._  The goal was to  **prevent**  further rejoinings, to  **prevent**  further loss and bloodshed. Era felt she could be fine with that; she had lived the whole of her life as an incomplete soul, it wasn't all that different now. Besides, would she even still be herself if she were to get it all back?

_'Get it back'... I'm not any better than the damned Ascians. I strive to defend the myriad of lives on each shard, yet I'm struggling to remain content to be the same as they are._

Era thought that if she could at least learn about the person she had been, could at least clear away some of the fog and mystery, could at least be rid of the horrible thought that she may well have killed someone who had once been a friend ( _he hadn't given us a choice_ , the wiser voice of Fray would chime in), she would stop finding herself sitting atop a tall building overlooking the shadow of a long dead city searching for clues.

But there was no one left to ask.

 


	22. Steward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again with the Shadowbringers end of MSQ spoilers. Don't read if you don't want a spoil.  
> There's going to be a spin-off series starting from this chapter once I find some time to write it out. Stay tuned :3
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Era stood in the lobby of the Capitol Building, thinking. She made to open the doors to the rest of the structure, the impossible alternate city that lay within, but the doors would not budge for her. In that case, here would have to do.

She laid a bouquet of flowers in front of the door, much to the ire of the attendant shade in the room (though he couldn't protest, she had gotten a permit). They were from Il Mheg, and would last a long while even cut as they were. There was a certain irony to that, she felt. She had wanted to bring living flowers, but the attendant would certainly have demanded she garden elsewhere.

"Feo Ul, do you have a moment?", Era inquired, already knowing the answer.

"Oh, for my loveliest sapling I have **all** moments in the world! What would you ask of me?" Feo Ul exclaimed, appearing as if from nowhere. Era, taking a final look at the bouquet, made to leave before the attendant's patience wore too thin. As endearing as they were in their limitations, being formed of memory and stuck in but a single moment in time, the shades' obstinance could be infuriating. The irony of **that** was not lost on her.

"Bismark's spell is due to wear off any time now, and the sea will return back to the way it was. Would it be possible to spare the city and the area immediately surrounding it? Just until the magics fueling the city fade?"

"Tis but a simple matter, no trouble at all. But my dearest sapling, was this not the bastion of your enemy? Why would you spare it?"

"The people of this city would be inconvenienced by the water", Era said simply. Feo Ul did not push the matter, sensing that to decry the shades' personhood would be distinctly the _wrong_ thing to do in front of their sapling.

"My silly mortal, you're mourning, making gestures for someone who no longer exists to care. Why go through all this trouble for someone who did not spare your very existence a second thought?"

"My gestures are less for him than for the shades"

"The shades have no need for your flowers" Feo Ul countered, not at all interested in half truths.

Era was quiet for a moment, trying to find the most accurate way to express the turmoil she felt.

"Because he spent near the entirety of his life doing just that. He desperately mourned each and every person he lost, though his definition of a person was admittedly very slim, and that includes whoever it was that I once was. If I will not mourn, there is no one else to do so but Elidibus, and he doesn't seem the type..."

"It's the least I can do to leave flowers".

"Very well, if it is my [adorable sapling's] wish to care for these shadows, your beautiful branch will see to it no water will come to burden them."

"Thank you, Feo Ul".  Era was glad to know the city would be safe. With all the harm Emet-Selch had caused, the few objectively good things he had a hand in ought to be preserved to make up for it, she thought. She made a mental note to visit the Primavista soon, and see what new plays Jenomis had written.


	23. Date

"Alright, that's it. I'm done. This draft is finished, those orders are filled, and I'm done."

"Yes yes, you've done enough for today." Jessie sighed

"I've attended those damn investor meetings.."

"And even stayed awake!" She encouraged, clearly wishing this would become a more regular occurrence.

"And I finished those orders ahead of schedule. All while working on my own projects", Cid said proudly and somewhat defensively. He was fishing around for something in the drawer of his workstation and, upon finding it, swiftly pocketed the small ornamented box.

"You've done good Chief! So, whatcha got planned for tonight?" Wedge asked excitedly. It wasn't often one saw Cid so energized.

"Made a reservation at the Bismark..."

"Not with company funds I hope...", Jessie muttered

Cid continued as if he hadn't heard, "And afterwards we'll do a little flight through the Sea of Clouds..."

Biggs chuckled, busy tidying up his own workstation, "Nice and romantic, eh? Got something other than that coat picked out?"

"Of course! Was just about to get ready..." 

The door to the workshop opened, and Era walked in. She was dressed in a lilac, airy shift with sparse flowers dotting the hem. Hair loose, with a ornamental clip to keep it out of her face. Far more girlish an outfit than she was often known to wear. Seeing the befuddled faces of everyone around, she asked "7:30, wasn't it?"

"Yes, but you're about an hour early..."

She pulled out a little pocket watch from a small handbag she carried, another uncommon wardrobe accessory for her. She seemed puzzled, but upon looking up at the chronometer on the wall, a look of understanding crossed her face. "Cid, that chronometer is slow. This watch just got wound, I'm certain it's accurate."

And so it was. Spurred on by their Chief's sudden increase in productivity, everyone had worked to the point that, of all the engineers that present in Cid's workshop, not a one had noticed the chronometer had needed repair for some two weeks now. Jessie, bless her poor overworked heart, was horrified. "But that means... oh gods, all the orders we got out _on time_ were **late**! Every single bleedin one of them....." The woman looked near to tears.

Wedge tried to cheer her, "It's alright Jessie! None of our clients seemed bothered, else we'd have noticed wouldn't we? Probably didn't expect.."

"Probably didn't expect us to produce things on time?! That's alright is it? Seven hells..." 

Era, feeling rather responsible for Jessie's sudden distress, tried to think of a way to right the issue. "If another day would be better..."

"No, absolutely not! This is the first day in damn near a month we've been able to meet! Jessie..", Cid began, turning to his second in command, "Though I doubt anyone is genuinely upset about items being an hour late I'll apologize to the clients tomorrow. No one noticed the bloody chronometer, it's nobody's fault. We've all been working hard, and you lot need to rest." 

"Now", he said, turning back to Era, "If that clock is slow, we're going to be late if we don't leave for Limsa soon. Let me change and we'll be off." 

"Might give your face a quick wash, you've got a bit of grease on your nose!" Biggs called after him as Cid made for the adjoining living quarters.The others too began to head off to their own quarters, be it the adjoining ones or private apartments.

Cid returned wearing a white collared shirt, sleeves rolled at the elbow, first two or three buttons at the chest inevitably undone, and nice pair of black pants and shoes (would it kill him to wear color?). His usual pendant was present, but to Era's surprise his forehead was devoid of his customary goggles. He claimed it 'killed the look', but Era suspected there was a little more to it than that. He almost never took them off, except when bathing or sleeping (unless he fell asleep at his desk, of course)... or when they were alone together. Perhaps it was a gesture, a 'this is me and you time' sort of thing. Or perhaps it really did just kill the look.

He forgot the grease smudge Biggs mentioned, as she knew he would, so she dabbed at it with a damp towel she had at the ready.

..................................................................................

The flight to Limsa was largely uneventful. They both simply enjoyed the trip. Era loved flying, specifically Cid's flying, and had long since passed the point where she was embarrassed to admit as much. She used to dislike the cheeky grin he gave whenever she was too plainly excited about the trip, thinking he was making fun of her. In reality, as she came to learn, he was just pleased that she was so happy and was more than a little proud.

Cid took a lot of pride in the things he did, for the most part, something that took Era a very long time to relate to but very little time to admire. For much of her time in Eorzea, her achievements had not felt like something earned, but rather things done by means of an unfair advantage. Cid had earned everything he had (which included her, she supposed), and she admired him immensely for it. Only once she began to feel responsible for her own accomplishments did she truly begin to understand that aspect of him, and one of the only real barriers between them finally break down. He was not some unreachable star, and she was not unworthy to be with him.

Era was practically glowing, smiling at the wind and the stars. Cid loved it when she did that. He had never been able to make good on his promise to get her memories back, but it seemed that her expressions had returned for the most part. It wasn't just his doing, of course, but he felt he could take some credit for the little things.

The time she giggled at some asinine joke of his, and couldn't stop for damn near 20 minutes.

The time, following a particularly, _*ahem*_   _energetic_ night, that she had an almost permanent smile on her face and blushed furiously when informed of it.

When, after Cid had a unusually bad dream regarding Meteor and the events leading up to it, she lost her head and swore up and down she'd clock Gaius next she saw him and then the entire imperial family following.

Perhaps it is because it's so blatant in her case that it sticks with him so. _The fact that she loves him._  The fact that she loves him to the point that such simple events broke down barriers set by (presumably) Hydelyn herself.

Of all the people who have ever claimed to care for him, markedly few have been genuine. Fewer still, when he tried to pursue any kind of relationship, were interested in much more than fame or looks. The early days in Eorzea were rife with such occurrences; he had been young and just fine with a few of the shorter term liaisons, but after a while it began to wear on him. Many of the ladies who approached him were either reluctant or outright refused to let him remove his goggles even. They liked his appearance and his reputation just enough to tolerate his heritage, but not enough to look at it.

This had not been the case with Era. Their first intimate night together, she had removed them herself. It was 'silly' to leave them on, she said, thinking he had forgotten they were there. Her first time, nervous as could be (though she'd not admit it), and she still had enough gumption to tear away a barrier that all others insisted on and called it silly. 

This was the woman he was taking on a meticulously planned date this night, and for whom he had been working on a little project of his own for the past month.

..................................................................................

Their dinner too, was largely uneventful. Their conversations were composed of what details of the past month that could not be discussed over linkshell. Era's adventures, Cid's new inventions, the Scions' shenanigans and the latest in workshop gossip. Hands were held, loving looks exchanged. However, underneath all the sweet words, heartfelt glances, and romantic gestures, Cid seemed to be antsy.

Was it because of that stupid chronometer? Despite his stubborn attitude, Era knew Cid took Jessie's concerns and advice to heart. She wouldn't be his number two if he did not. Era fully expected that come tomorrow the entire workshop would gang up on the poor lazy timepiece and modify it to the point it would never err again. She redoubled her efforts at sweet talk, so that she might take his mind off the matter. Still, as dinner drug on he grew increasingly restless.

..................................................................................

When finally they set off toward the Sea of Clouds, Era broached the subject. " Cid... Is there something the matter? You seem... well, I dunno. You seem like there's something on your mind."

Cid just looked at her for a bit, a curious expression on his face. And all of a sudden, it was filled with resolve. He made for the nearest island and set the ship to rest. "Era, I've been working on something I haven't told you about for a while now.  As much as I hate our long separations, it did provide me with the opportunity to finally do so." His hand was in his pocket, holding a small item of some kind.  "We've been together for some time now, and I like to think neither of us plan to change that, so I thought...thought that perhaps we might make it more official."

"What do you..." Era began, but stopped when Cid started to kneel. And in that moment, her brain was trying really very, very hard to process what was happening.

"Era Hess, would you be my..." Cid was taking the little box out of his pocket and had started to open it, but no sooner had the word "Wife" left his lips than two arms were flung around his neck, hugging him almost too tightly. She hadn't even looked at the dammed thing.

"Yes" was all she said. All she could say, with her head swimming so. Cid hugged her back, at a loss for words himself. He had been in a strange state the whole night, both expecting the answer she gave and fearing the one she did not. After a while, when he had come down somewhat from his elation, he chuckled and made to prise her from him. 

"As flattered as I am that you didn't even pause, I really did work hard on this. Here.", He said grinning ear to ear, and handed her the box.

Inside was a small silver ring of intricate metalwork. It was split in two halves, one resembling a vine with leaves and little flowers made of small blue gems. The other was a simple, straight bar with a streak of similar blue down the center, ending in both spots where it met the vine. In the very center was a flower, petals of more blue gems and a little glowing blue spot in the middle of it. An engraving similar to that of an Arcanist's book wound around the inside of the ring.

"I had a little help with that part", he said as she looked at the engraving, trying to make sense of it. "It's a meant to draw upon your aether to cast a small, perpetual protection spell. In the event you can't use your aether, the tiny amount of Ceruleum in the flower and the surrounding water crystals should be able to pick up the slack."

"It's lovely". Era was in awe of it, it really was beautiful.

"It had to match its wearer", Cid said cheekily.

Cid put the ring on her finger with utmost care, as if either she or it would vanish at any moment, revealing this to be a dream. He kissed her lightly, lips petal soft and reverent, taking her newly adorned hand in his. Era embraced him once more, burying her face against his chest, loathe to let go. The two stood like that for what seemed to be ages, neither wanting or needing to speak. They reveled in the silence, as it seemed that all the world had disappeared from around them.

It was just them, the ship, and the endless sky.

 


	24. Sickday

It was winter in Mor Dhona, and bitingly cold.  The apartments that attached to the Ironworks' workshop and offices shared the same heating system, which was currently busted. Nero had been attempting to make some utterly unnecessary improvements, and blew out a crucial component, one not easily recreated. They had no spares on hand, and the materials needed to craft a replacement hadn't yet arrived.  Nero was promptly banished to wherever he usually scuttled off to, and the residents endeavored to make do in their freezing rooms.

Evening was the worst, and though Era had offered to let them all stay at the Rising Stones, most refused, stubbornly trying to jury rig a replacement part with various alternative materials. Cid was one such person, and so Era chose to suffer the cold with him, making hot drinks and food (heated with fire crystals) to keep the team's ridiculously bullheaded spirits up. 

Alas, in doing so, Era had neglected her own health, and like a fool promptly caught a cold. Stubborn attracts stubborn, however. She said nothing of her ailment, ignoring it as the days passed, still striving to keep the team as warm as possible despite their lack of success. With as hyper focused on his task as Cid would get, it took Era's idiot genius lover several days to notice something was amiss.

"Era, are you well?" He asked as she handed him the 14th warm drink of the day. He, along with everyone else, was bundled in just about every jacket and blanket a person could possibly bear and still move, though still fewer than the others, native Garlean that he was. "You look rather pale..."

"I'm just fine", she lied with a cough. "Just tired. Had something caught in my throat", she added in response to his raised eyebrows at her cough. She stifled yet another.

Unobservant though he may be when focused on work, he wasn't blind. "Alright, you little liar." He said, shoving the cocoa back into her hands and directing her to drink it. Addressing his crew, he said, "This isn't working. Rowena says the shipment is supposed to arrive in two days time. Until then, everyone head to the Rising stones. Jessie and Tataru have had cots prepared in the main room for whenever we decided to call it quits. And you", he said, turning back to Era, "are going to a healer."

"Y'shtola and Krile aren't here, and it isn't so serious as to need to pay some random healer. I'm. Fine." Era protested, wobbling a little. He caught her, lifting her over his shoulder and marching toward the Rising Stones.

.........

"You needn't fuss so", Era said as he tucked her into bed in her room.

"Says the woman who fussed over both me and my employees for near a week now", Cid laughed, plopping down beside her, medicine and a tea in hand. "Drink all of both", he directed, propping her up.

"You'll get sick too, sitting so close", she scolded, despite snuggling closer. Gods he was so warm.

"Garleans are immune to colds"

"Bull", She handed the empty glasses back, Cid setting them on the side table next to the rest of the medicine. "Though with that gigantic chest window your coat has, I'm half inclined to believe you".

"I thought you liked that coat", Cid teased back, scooching down so that his head lay on the pillow beside her. Immune or no, Cid didn't seem to care at all about the risk, arms wrapped around her waist and face nestled in the crook of her neck. His breath was warm, much like the furnace that was the rest of him, doing away with the chill Era still felt in spite the multitude of blankets covering her.

"Whatever am I to do with you?"

"Well, you've already agreed to marry me, so there's that.  I suppose you'll have to have me help you move in, too. You can have me make toast, and tea though I won't remember to refill the blasted kettle. I hear I'm fairly good at tinkering, so if there's something broken you can just have me fix it..." He stopped at a pat on his arm and furious giggles from his fiancee. 

"My my, how handy! And handsy", she laughed in response to his now roaming hands. Laughing in kind, he ceased his explorations, having only really intended to be silly.

"Mmm, I suppose I had better behave, unwell as you are." He always got like this whenever they were alone. A generally bashful and private man when it came to romance, when it was just the two of them all of his shyness fell away to reveal an incorrigible flirt. He kissed the back of her head, near the base of one of her ears, resulting in a small "eek" and another fit of giggles from Era. 

"I'll need to get well soon then", she said, her eyes taking on an uncharacteristic smolder reserved solely for his viewing. "It's a good thing I have you to take care of me", she hummed, turning to snuggle against his chest. One hand went to his face, thumb stroking a particularly soft patch of beard on the side. She stifled a small cough, drifting off to sleep as he gently massaged one of her ears (the surest way to relax her). Cid was soon to follow, lulled to sleep by the combination of her quiet, uneven breaths and the low light of the dying fireplace.

.........

The next morning, Era awoke to a thief. Cid had somehow stolen _all_ the blankets in his sleep, leaving her with only the warmth of his back. The combination of medicine and a comfortable rest, however, had left her feeling far better so the chill did not overly bother her. Cid, on the other hand, was _not_ in fact immune to colds and was shivering under the mountain of quilts and throws he had pilfered.Thinking to herself that her love was terribly foolish for a genius, she wrested half of the blankets from him, moving in close to warm him up. He evidently was thinking the same thing, letting out a sheepish, exhausted chuckle that devolved into a fit of coughing.

"Looks like we'll both have to stay right here, lest we make everyone else sick too." Era sighed, wrapping her arms around him and resting her head between his shoulder blades.

She couldn't see it, but she knew he was smiling. "How will we ever manage to weather such hardship?" He asked, taking one of her hands in his, entwining their fingers.

"Beats me. At least we'll be warm". She snuggled closer, thoroughly enjoying their bad luck.

 

 


	25. A Fine Gift

"Your nameday's coming up soon, isn't it Chief?" Biggs inquired, wiping down their latest prototype model of manacutter. Mk.6, or some such.

"Oh yes, the day people get to tell me how ancient I am. Don't remind me." Cid pouted, clearly not looking forward to the prospect.

Era looked up from her book, confused. "But you're not old, and you certainly don't look it". He cheered a little at this, flashing her a grateful smile.

"Chief'd  look even  less old if he'd just shave every once in a while". Wedge chimed in.

Jessie looked up from her ledger in agreement, "Exactly! We've been telling him for ages. The Chief has the absolute worst case of baby face I've ever seen. You wouldn't think it, with how brawny he is. Looks years younger. A trim is long overdue."

"I'm not shaving it!!" Cid bellowed. It was plainly a subject that had been brought up many a time before, and certainly would be again.

"You know, I actually can't really recall what you look like without it. I only ever saw the once, with the echo, and the echo is always so blurry". Era mused, struggling to imagine Cid's beard bereft visage.

" _Should_ I shave it, then?" Cid asked genuinely, not an onze of his previous vitriol present. He gave his beard an absent minded stroke, trying to decide how long he could bear to part with it.

" _N..no_! You don't have to go that far..." Era stuttered, only to be shouted over by an irate Jessie.

"Oh, so you'll shave for her, but not for us? Time and time again we've asked..."

"There are _several_ things I'd do for her I wouldn't do for you lot", Cid shot back, a slight smirk growing on his face.

" _Cid!_ " Squeaked the bright red Miqo'te, having caught his meaning.

Cid just grinned, loving how embarrassed she got at the smallest things. "Beard or no, someone will find a way to call me old. The fewer people that remember my nameday, the better I say."

"Still", Era argued, recovering somewhat from her mortification, "We should celebrate just a little bit, at the very least. It's not your nameday every day. Is there anything you want?"

"Peace and quiet?" He suggested hopefully.

Era grinned, "Come now, let's be realistic".

"How about a day off?" Biggs offered, tightening bolts here and there on the manacutter.

Jessie snorted, "With the backlog of orders we've got going thanks to his wandering about at random? You wish!" She slammed the ledger shut for emphasis. It was true Cid had been out and about a rather lot of late, volunteering to assist the Scions largely for a chance to leave the workshop once in a while.

"A party then? After work, with the Scions and friends?!" Wedge added helpfully as he passed Biggs another wrench.

Cid groaned. "That's the exact opposite of peace and quiet. If you want an excuse to see Tataru, I'm sure there's something that needs repairing at the Rising Stones", he said, having used much the same excuse to see Era on occasion, "I just want everyone to forget it. No nameday, no jokes about going grey the day I was born, just an ordinary day". He returned his attention to his work, growing deaf to any further debate on the matter.

Nobody was quite satisfied with this, but Cid didn't seem liable to budge on the issue, stubborn as he was. They all silently resolved to convene in secret, to come up with some way to celebrate.

.....................

Gathered around a small dusty table within a storage room in the Rising Stones, lit almost ominously by handful of dim lanterns, Era, Biggs, Wedge, and Jessie began to brainstorm.

They had a consensus on the small details: a quiet, low energy gathering. A nice dinner, cooked by Bismarck-trained-chef Era, cake again prepared by Era, and gifts. The gift, they decided, had to be good enough to make up for the blandness of the rest of the event. They contemplated each inventing something for him, though the idea was deemed a flop on the basis that it would be nigh impossible to keep them a secret.

Era also wanted to provide him something other than her cooking, as she cooked often anyway. It wouldn't be special. She wanted to give him something permanent, something he could use. But what could she get him that he could not make better himself? She only knew of a few craftsmen more skilled, and even they were specialists... Oh.

"Looks like little miss has an idea", Biggs noted, breaking the long silence that had permeated the room in the wake of their combined deliberations.

"Perhaps...I was thinking that Cid might appreciate new tools. Lazy though he can be at times, he truly loves his work. Higher quality tools surely would make him happy. And it could be a group gift, as I know nothing about tools. I'll need your expertise".

"It's  a good idea, for sure", Jessie began, though the 'but' was evident. "Tools better than the ones he has would be a small fortune, though. He made a lot of them himself, after all". She sounded rather disappointed; new tools would be just the thing to get him inspired to work consistently again.

Era nodded; she knew that in any other situation her suggestion would be entirely unrealistic. But she had an ace up her sleeve, or so she hoped. "I may actually be able to get such things free of charge, or for relatively little. I happen to know a master goldsmith who may be willing to make them as a favor to me, as I've helped his son out of a number of tight spots in the past. I can't guarantee he'll do it, of course, but if you all can provide me with specs for the tools, I know he'll have the skill to make them if he does agree".

"Who would that be?" Wedge asked, feet kicking back and forth as they dangled from his too-high chair.

"Godbert Manderville", she said, shying away from their surprised gasps and shouts, shushing them lest their secret meeting be discovered.

.....................

As the Ironworks Crew gathered up all the details needed to make the tools, Era set to work getting in contact with Godbert. She hadn't seen Hildy in some time ( _thank the Twelve_ ), and so had not met Godbert in quite a while. Knowing he often did business with the Fortemps family, she reached out to her adoptive father Edmont, who happily arranged tea for the three of them. Godbert agreed nearly immediately, citing her dedication to his son's well being (she neglected to point out she often had no choice in her interactions with Hildy), and so the rest of tea was spent regaling both Hildy's father and her own with tales of her adventures, at their combined request.

With the specs from Biggs, Wedge, and Jessie, as well as the high quality materials Era gathered and provided, it took Godbert next to no time at all to craft a full set of of the finest instruments imaginable. Truly, his craftsmanship was a  wondrous thing to behold. Era couldn't thank him enough, expressing her gratitude profusely until Julyan demanded she hush up already and be on her way. Packed away in a custom case, everything was now ready for the big day.

.....................

Cid's nameday started, as he had requested so vehemently, as any other. He did, however, take a bit more time that morning to sleep in, indulging in early morning snuggles with his darling Warrior of Light. After stretching with a loud series of pops emanating from his joints, Era teasingly asked after the state of his 'aged bones', earning her a furious tickling until she relented and apologized, laughing away.  A light breakfast was followed by a surprisingly easy day of work, during which Cid was curiously allowed to work on whatever he pleased with no pressuring about impending deadlines. He couldn't possibly miss the air of excitement emanating from his employees and sweetheart, and began to brace himself for whatever surprises they had in store for him despite his prior protests. But that's part of what he loved about all of them; they never truly listened to everything his damnfool ass said, ever insistent whenever they thought themselves in the right, all just as bullheaded as he.

Era prepared a truly marvelous meal and equally marvelous cake, just as he suspected she might. Regardless of the quality of her training, her culinary talent was astounding. It struck him as rather a missed opportunity, that she could not live indulging in her love of botany and cooking. A greenhouse and cafe would be perfect for her, surely to rival the finest establishments in Eorzea. It saddened him a little, but he had little time to mull over the misfortune, as everyone became increasingly antsy, whispering amongst themselves as if he couldn't hear. Biggs reached into one of the taller cabinets, one Cid often had trouble reaching and thus avoided out of frustration, and pulled out what appeared to be a rather ornate toolbox. It had several bows looped around the handle, cheesily colored in the Ironworks blue.

"Open it!", they all said in unison, their excitement uncontainable. Chuckling and doing as bade, he opened the box to reveal the finest set of hammers, wrenches,screwdrivers, and myriad other oft used tools he had ever lain eyes on. _Surely, a set of this quality must be worth all of Mor Dhona_. "How in the seven hells..." Cid started, baffled eyes searching the four staring back at him with baited breath.

"I called in a favor", Era offered in a hardly sufficient explanation, beaming away.

"Go on then", Wedge prompted, bouncing up and down in his seat, "give the hammer a try!" 

Cid did, finding the grip perfect for his hands, the weight of the implement ideal. Words were lost to him, though by the looks of his companions' faces, his reaction was more than sufficient. He was positively itching to use the set now, countless inventions springing to mind unbidden. Standing upright, he began to gather up the box, already sketching out plans in his head. _The Excelsior would appreciate a tune up, right?_   Giving Era a loving kiss and the others a mighty hug, he near bolted from the room, followed by their fond laughter. They knew him only too well.


	26. Fervor

In this moment, their hands could not be anywhere but on one another.

Neither Era nor Cid were immensely needy people, and so their work and travels bringing them to places far from each other for long periods of time was not often an issue.... But an entire month with _zero_ overlapping days home was excessive even for them.

The walk to their shared apartment had been an arduous one, their hunger thinly veiled and every interruption or distraction a test of willpower and decorum. Once behind the privacy of the thrice locked door of their abode, however...

Fingers worked at buttons and belts with abandon, and not a solitary thought went toward aught but relieving their clothing of duty and keeping their lips locked together as much as was physically possible. Not a single thought, then, was afforded to the clutter strewn about the living room.

The parched pair were incorrigibly untidy people, and their apartment was a hazard zone of tools, plants, scrapped inventions, and various bits & bobs pilfered from some ruin or another.

It was a miracle that they made it to the far wall with only a few casualties: a chair or two unceremoniously knocked over, as well as a table and stack of research papers violently introduced to the floor. 

An attempt to employ a nearby storage cabinet was met with much complaint from the furniture, seemingly unwilling to bear the weight of the two single-minded lovestruck fools, and the effort was abandoned. The wall would do just as well, and Era found herself pleasantly sandwiched between it and her fervent lover. 

A hum from her busy lips marked her approval, and her hand wrapped in his hair issued an unspoken order to stay. Cid, of course, was more than happy to comply, pressing her more firmly to the wall and to him, adjusting only slightly to allow him space to stroke the base of her tail, which lashed about happily in response.

Every button undone was punctuated with a kiss, every resistant buckle earned the wearer a love mark until it gave way. Neither would walk away without bruises, be they inflicted by unhappy furniture or eager mouths.

The bed was like to see its fair share of use later in the evening, perhaps, but at present their patience had all but run out.


	27. The Past, pt.1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written with a lot of help from the lovely people over at Emet-Selch's Wholesomely Debauched and Enabling Book Club <3  
> https://discord.gg/D7qF9RD

Era had been suffering a series of splitting headaches not unlike those preceding a vision from the Echo. However, no such vision was forthcoming, leaving her to fight against the pain with no relief in sight. Cid worried over her, trying in vain to ease her suffering, but nothing he could do or provide was of any help. After days of fitful 'rest', she was finally overcome in her exhaustion, falling into a sleep so deep it in of itself was worrisome. Unwilling to let her alone, Cid held her fast to him, slowly but surely drifting off as well.

….……..

Cid found himself standing alone in a snow laden forest, the cold of which curiously lacked the bone-deep chill inherent to the locale. The edges of the area seemed to blur and fade into nothingness, solidifying only once he focused his attention in one direction or another. Breathing deep, he was overwhelmed not with the scent of the surrounding pines as one might reasonably expect, but of _lavender._

_Strange._

As he took in the scene around him he spied an odd blue light emanating from the distance, bouncing off the falling snow in a misty cerulean fog. A faint, intoxicating music drifted on the wind, calling him toward it. As ever, curiosity bested him and compelled him forward as surely as the music, his surroundings increasingly bathed in soothing blue.The ground and trees and snow all started to devolve into gradient around him and a great Crystal came into view. The forest and all it held dissolved impossibly into a deep blue void before the Crystal, telling him in full certainty, in the odd way dreams do, that this was far from reality.

 _A dream. Of course, he was dreaming_. Cid berated himself for not arriving to this conclusion sooner, though, given his experiences, one might forgive him for having trouble discerning the fantastical from the real. 

He paused to ponder this revelation, only to have a young Miqo'te girl run into his shins full tilt. She was frantic, evidently fleeing the Crystal in the distance. In terror she moved to hide behind him but, growing brave, instead stood in front with arms thrown wide, guarding him from the tendrils of light that pursued her.

The girl, too, cannot be real, as she is unmistakably Era -- though she couldn’t possibly be more than 5 or 6. Her head barely reached past his knees, her tiny body all ears and fluffy, stubby tail. Turning her head towards him, large and twinkling periwinkle eyes gazed into his own with fear and determination. She would quit this place, but was not about to leave someone else to fall victim to whatever unearthly intentions the Crystal bore.

_But of course she wouldn't._

Not knowing what else to do and hating beyond reason how the scene made Era tremble, he picked her up and tossed her over his shoulder, making hastily back toward the woods where the scenery carried more of the weight of reality. Tendrils of blue followed for a time, but grew weak and ceased as they passed beyond the treeline.

The pervasive feel of danger fading, Cid adjusted his hold on the child, cradling her so that she might be more comfortable. True to her apparent age, much of her earlier bravado had vanished and her eyes brimmed with fitful tears, though she stubbornly would not suffer them to fall. This youthful Era inexplicably took no issue with her rescuer being a complete stranger, knowing, as ( _or because_ ) Cid did, that he was no threat. 

"Thanks", she squeaked, in a tiny voice that was both Era's and not. This voice gave rise to a thought that had been nagging at Cid since he had fallen asleep: _This is more than a dream._

Though Cid took great pride in his mind and imagination, he was under no illusion that he could dream up an Era so lifelike. She was here, with him somehow, despite appearance and circumstance. Everything around him smacked of both hyperbole and truth, as if he were participating in some abstract amalgamation of her childhood. As if to punctuate this point, a number of buildings were quickly coming into view in the distance. _Her home_ , he thought with a certainty he could not begin to explain. The buildings gave him uncomfortable pause, however. The architecture and green hued lights were unmistakable; the town before him was Garlean. 

"Whatever were you doing all the way out there? You're from the town ahead, no? " Cid asked, though he knew he already knew the answer. Nothing and everything felt like a mystery here.

He suspected, as strongly as one does when they know they're right but cannot definitively say so, that the Echo must be involved. _It must be_. The telltale migraines should have been his first clue, but when they failed to reveal to her whatever it was they meant to show he assumed she was simply ill. That the air smelled of lavender should have been the second; it was the smell of her, her presence and her influence. How and why the vision, if it even was one, was feeding back to _him_ was utterly beyond his comprehension. The only precedent he had was when she recovered his own memories, but this vision surely had nothing at all to do with _him_ or _his_ memory. 

"I was looking for snowflowers and I got lost. Tutor did warn me not to wander but... the big Crystal _called_ me. Like she was my friend, like she knew me. She's really pretty, all big and blue and sparkly, but the way she looked at me was so _scary_. I don't like it."

"Well, I think we're well shut of the blasted thing now; I'll not let it hurt you while I'm here. Let's get you home, little miss."

Era nodded, smiling, and snuggled in closer, gripping the collar of his coat.

"Please don't tell Mama and Papa I wandered. Tutor said not to, and if Tutor says so the Viceroy says so. They're ever so scared of him."

"The Viceroy takes personal interest in your family?" _A province then. She grew up in a province._ Northeastern Ilsabardian, if the surroundings were anything to go off of, in the mountains. Cid wasn't quite sure how to feel, his stomach twisting uncomfortably at the thought of what she must have endured at the mercy of his homeland. A guilty part of him was not unhappy that she did not remember.

"Umm hmm. He thinks I'm clever. Cleverer than the other kids, though I don't agree. He said that if I stay smart, and be good, that I can go to the capitol when I'm bigger."

 _Fat chance of that now, huh._ They had reached the streets now, eerily empty, lights lit everywhere but not a soul around. Era pointed an itty bitty finger toward a modest home just off of a large, gated complex undoubtedly meant to house the Viceroy in question. "My lips are sealed. And...and you'd like to visit? The capitol?" Though Cid bore little love for Garlemald, it had on occasion crossed his mind that he'd have liked to show his former home to her.

"Not really."

She hardly missed a beat. Cid fought back a laugh.

"I study 'cause if I do he'll keep being nice to Mama and Papa. I dunno why, but he's not nice to everyone else. That's why the other kids don't like me, I think, but Papa says 'there's no help for the jealousy of others'." She mimicked her father's deeper voice, failing spectacularly with her much squeakier one.

Cid supposed she was right. "Aye, but you seem pleasant enough to me. I'm sure they'll come around." _So she'd been but a puppet for other's convenience since childhood..._

They were nearing the doors of the small house, the light emanating from the windows warmer than that of those surrounding it, undampened by the cold metal and dark stone. Inviting. Safe. He could leave her here without worry, he knew, but... to leave her to whatever abuse she was bound to face as the favorite of a provincial viceroy... though there was no avoiding it, he struggled with the thought. To hand her, his very heart, as tiny and fragile as she was now, into such arms...

"Aera! Oh my darling, we were so worried!" a woman's voice rang out from the hastily thrown open door, the Miqo'te mother rushing toward the pair and wresting Era from Cid's hold.  A stern looking man, the father, followed not far behind. Era was the spitting image of her mother, and her father, though white haired and tan, bore uncanny resemblance to a certain Ishgardian Count.

"Mama! Papa! I'm really sorry." Era ( _no, Aera_ ) clung tightly to her mother, ears pressed back and voice sincere in its apology. Looking back to Cid, she smiled at him with a warmth he knew all too well. "I got a little lost on my way back from the library, and this mister found me and helped me home. Can he stay for supper?" 

Not wishing to impose upon the family, Cid started to protest, but his curiosity and the cacophony of "Please? Pretty please?" falling from the child's lips got the better of him. He merely smiled, shrugging at Era's fervor. She seemed very keen that her newfound friend not vanish into the aether, and given she likely had no others he thought it fair.

Her mother eyed him warily, the center lens of his goggles to be specific, but after a brief, wordless consult with her husband she assented, asking his name and welcoming him. The smell of lavender grew stronger as she ushered him in, mingled now with the familiar scent of _ceruleum_ , of all things. Hardly a common pairing.

Walking through, the scene dispersed into light.

…...........................................

 

 


	28. The Past, pt.2

Rather than a warm hearth and a table set for dinner, Cid’s surroundings were far more ostentatious. The charming family had vanished, to be replaced with a multitude of youths, all wearing familiar deep red and black.

Cid found himself in the foyer of the Magitech Academy, wading through a sea of people, making toward a pair of men he found vaguely familiar, both dressed as aides. He himself was not directing his steps, moving rather as if on rails, a passenger in his own body.

_This is no longer a dream, but a memory._

He heard himself speaking to the aides, though he cared little for the conversation. _When was this, that the scene would be so unfamiliar to him?_   His past self began to survey the crowd.

_Prospective students. It must be an entry exam day… Hadn’t he been asked to proctor one such exam, long ago?_

His gaze landed finally on a particularly unusual aspirant. A miqo'te girl, with periwinkle eyes and short cropped snow white hair, attired not unlike her peers, in what must be her early teens. Stonefaced and proud, she did an admirable job of ignoring the swarm of disdainful eyes on her. She had with her a small notebook, defiantly directing her attention to its pages in a valiant attempt at last minute review. 

_Era! But how?_

Beside her stood a stern looking man of pureblood lineage, possessed both of hawklike nose and eyes. He was speaking softly to the young woman with an easy familiarity,  his posture both protective and guiding. He was most certainly her guardian, her handler whilst she was in the capitol. Perhaps the tutor she spoke of as well; it was not uncommon practice for such people to be placed in a child’s life from early on to gain trust and compliance. So long as the guardian remained loyal to their appointer and not their charge, the arrangement was often very effective at raising patriotic provincial youths.

The thought made him sick.

_[“...you look rather fine in imperial black and crimson! Definitely your colors!”]_

Cid wanted to kick himself.

He caught whispers from those around him, all pertaining to his dearest.  
_~Whatever is a Savage doing here?~_  
_~I hear she’s some viceroy’s little pet. Father said there was a ridiculous petition before the board for a young savage to sit the exam. It ought to have been dismissed outright, but the daft man pulled a number of favors...~_  
_~I heard it reached the ear of the Emperor himself! That the idea was so ludicrous he gave his assent for a laugh!_  
_~Shhh, if that’s true you ought not be gossiping about it in public! Really!~_

Cid silenced the lot with a withering glare. A hush fell over the room; they all knew who he was, and not a one was fool enough to cross him. He made his way over to the miqo’te youth, who looked up at him with suspicion. Okay... perhaps not _everyone_ knew him.

_How did he not remember this?!_

“Well would you look at that?! You must be around the same age I was when I sat the exam. Nervous?” His younger self chuckled warmly, or at least that must have been the intent. Cid mentally grimaced at how condescending he sounded. Little wonder Era didn’t respond, eyeing him warily. Undoubtedly on guard for whatever foul trickery lay at the end of his questioning. What aim did this pureblood have, making nice with her?

Her handler, the picture of decorum, cleared his throat, leaning down to whisper in her ear. Informing her of Cid’s identity, and _station_ , no doubt, for she changed her tune with lightning speed, eyes swimming with mingled fear and astonishment. For an applicant with so much stacked against her, she had the rotten luck of speaking with quite possibly the person she could most ill afford to offend.

“Only a little nervous. I’ve..I’ve studied very hard.” Her handler cleared his throat once more. “Sir!” She added. Her tail, still quite a bit shorter than it was in adulthood, was near wrapped around her leg. She was terrified, hugging her little notebook tight to her chest.

 _She’d called him ‘sir’._ In any other circumstance Cid would have found that hilarious.

“I’ve no doubt. I’m sure you’ll do just fine.” Cid smiled, ears catching the renewed whispers of her peers. He’d made a target of her with his behavior, he knew, having acted without thinking, and decided it was only right to see it to the end. He would grant her no undeserved favors, but it was the least he could do to see she was treated equitably.

“Tell you what: After you finish up, come find me. You must've come a long way to visit the capitol, it wouldn’t be right to make you wait for the results. I’m sure you’ll be keen to know how you did.” He leaned in, whispering conspiratorially, “I happen to know the people here are notoriously slow graders, so let’s see if I can’t hurry them along.” 

_And also ensure they graded **fairly**._

“T...thank you! But I wouldn’t wish to impose…”

“No, it’s no imposition! Why I…” But Cid was cut off by the arrival of one of his aides.

“Sir, urgent news!” whispered the man, attempting to usher Cid to a more private locale. Cid shot him a harsh glance for interrupting, but the man continued, voice even lower, “From Bozja, sir. Please.”

_…._  
_No_  
_…_  
_No no no..._

_It couldn’t be…_

“Alright alright, fine. You, young lady”, He said, turning his attention back to Era. “After the exam, come find me. No buts.”

If he let her do otherwise, it wouldn't matter if she passed or not. Loath as he was to admit it, the school would never admit a 'savage', even if it meant doctoring a passing grade to a failing one. More than anything, she needed him to vouch for her. Cid couldn't stomach the injustice, not when it was looking him in the face.

“Yes, sir!” She gave a little bow as he began to step away, at the direction of her chaperone like as not.

_Oh, but he wouldn’t be there. No, it would be fifteen years before she found him again…_

Cid followed his assistant to a quiet alcove, away from prying eyes and ears. Internally he strained against the action, willing himself to wake up.

_Please not this. Not again._

“Alright, out with it. What’s father done now?”

_Of course. This is why he didn’t remember. He didn’t **want** to._

“Sir, there’s been a terrible accident. The citadel, it’s...it’s _gone_.”

....

Cid did not proctor the exam that day, or any other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cid's younger self is like 19 here, so please forgive him for being a bit arrogant and shortsighted.  
> There's one more chapter of wrap-up after this, so hold tight haha.  
> https://discord.gg/D7qF9RD


	29. The Past, pt.3

………  
...id.”

He was being shaken, the shadows of his memory being knocked loose like so many cobwebs.

“Cid!”

Cid awoke to Era leaning over him, face full of panic. He felt rather out of breath, his body covered in cold sweat. The mess of sheets told him he must have been flailing.

“Was it… were you dreaming of Carteneau again?” One of her hands was running up and down his back reassuringly, her other making its way to his head, pulling him in close.

“Not Carteneau, no. Something else, though very nearly as unpleasant”, he said once his breath returned to him, tucking his head against her chest. “I’ll be glad to forget it.”

“Your headaches, they’ve subsided?” Cid asked, pondering the content of his dreams. To tell her, or to let sleeping dogs lie? Which would make her happier?

He felt Era nod. “I feel worlds better now, though I’m not sure what finally sent them away.”

“It’s the strangest thing”, she muttered into his hair, “I don’t think I dreamt at all, or if I did it’s since been forgotten, but… I awoke with the feeling that we had been speaking.” Her fingers twirled one of his locks idly. _Sigh_ “Maybe you were talking in your sleep.”

“Maybe. Say, Era… do you think when you were small, you had one of those stubby little tails we see on the miqo'te kids about town?”

“I suppose, I wouldn't think it’d be very long that young. But whatever brought that on?” She laughed, index finger drawing lazy circles on his shoulder blade.

“Nothing”, Cid lied, “Just a stray thought. Speaking of stray thoughts, though, I have a little theory I’d like to run by you.” This way would be better, give her the choice.

“Hmm?”

“I was thinking it’s rather peculiar how you arrived in the Shroud, what with a shipwreck and all that. Not too many people are daft or desperate enough to try and sail to a place with few to no docks. I think… and if this isn’t to your liking I’ll drop it, but...I think it wouldn’t be a bad idea to check with Jessie and see if there weren’t any refugees bound for the Black Shroud  at around that time.”

Cid paused, adjusting to look her in the face, seeing the realization of what he was implying dawn on her. Light began to filter in through the window, leaving odd patterns on her skin.

“We’re just about the only group able or willing to help Garlean defectors, and Gridania would be the go-to place to hide a Keeper of the Moon. The Ironworks may have been stretched a bit thin in my absence, but I know Jessie wouldn’t have quit trying.  Though I imagine we wouldn’t have had the resources to search for people who didn’t manage to meet at the rendezvous point.”

“So you think I might’ve been on a ship fleeing the Empire?”

“Possibly. I think it’s worth a look, at the least.”

Era was quiet for a time, mulling over his argument.

“Would it bother you, if I had?”

“Bother me?”

“Yeah, I just...no, nevermind.”

“No, not ‘nevermind’. What are you asking?”

“Nothing. Really.”

“Era, you could be from the moon and I wouldn't give a damn, and you know that. What’re you asking?”

“....If I were from a province, I don’t want you to feel badly about it, is all. I see the way you look at the people who come by the workshop hoping for a new start…it’s as if you think you took their homes from them yourself. I don’t want that, those sad eyes.”

"I don't…!"

"You do."

….."You're right. I do. But it's not like I'm not responsible for some of that"

"It's been fifteen years!"

"It has, and many of the weapons used today were developed from schematics my father or I drew up! I'm not blameless. But I get your point." Cid adjusted so that he was now holding her, flipping onto his back to rest Era on his chest. "It's hardly my business bearing it all, either."

Cid considered for a while, hands wandering her back and shoulders absently, one sliding down her arm to take her hand in his, examining the length of her fingers in comparison to his own. “ _You_ really aren’t bothered by the possibility? If you are from a province, I’d have been…”

“You’d have been Cid”, Era cut in, her tone heavy with finality. “The man I love, the person who’s always at my side when I need him. I’ve no use for any past that says otherwise.”

Cid didn’t quite know what to say to that, so he said nothing at all, nodding softly and resting his chin on the crown of her head. The sun had risen higher in the sky whilst they spoke, the patterns of light moving from Era’s skin to rest on the far wall.

Perhaps he was wrong, and Jessie and co hadn’t tried to smuggle Era’s family out like he thought. They weren’t responsible for _every_ refugee’s relocation. Maybe they would find nothing. Maybe. A part of him hoped.

But Cid also knew he owed it to her to try. Without Era, Cid wouldn't be Cid. He’d still be Marques, trying to fill the shoes Alphinaud claimed belonged to him. Even at the risk that she would come to hate him for it, he ought to make the effort.  
_She wouldn't hate him, would she?_  
He hugged her, squeezing tighter than probably should have, though she offered no complaint.

………

Indeed, Jessie had received word from contacts within the empire that several people from a predominantly Keeper of the Moon inhabited province in the eastern foothills required immediate assistance and relocation. A fairly well-to-do family (for a province, anyway) had run afoul of their Viceroy benefactor by unwittingly housing a child of a resistance movement for the night, mistakenly believing the boy to be lost rather than a fugitive on the run.

The viceroy had little tolerance for pets that bit the hand that fed them, and ordered the parents put in chains and their daughter, a young woman, immediately enlisted in the military. He had kept her from it in hopes her clever mind would make a name for his province and leadership, but the endeavor had borne little fruit, and those brains in a rebel mind were naught but a threat.

They were spared their fate by the very same resistance movement that uprooted their lives, who had come to rescue the boy. The family and the child could no longer find safety in any Garlean land, and were _strongly_ advised to flee. The resistance contacted smugglers, who in turn contacted the Ironworks, and the group set sail in the hold of a merchant ship bound for the Black Shroud.

Jessie confirmed they never received word from the escapees, and that their arrival date would have roughly matched the day Era washed ashore. The wood wailers had found no other survivors, Era knew. If she had been on that ship, she alone lived.

It was a long shot, Jessie said, as to do so was quite dangerous, but the smugglers occasionally kept dossiers of their charges to serve as sort of tombstone for those that didn’t make it to safety. They could request "Era's" and be sure.

Era merely shook her head at Jessie’s offer, hugging her and thanking her for the help. She'd heard enough. If she was indeed this family’s daughter, she wasn’t sure she’d like the person she was. A Viceroy’s pet? She’d take Warrior of Light over that any day.

She didn’t notice that Cid had been holding his breath, nor that he seemed to breathe a bit easier upon her decision.

As the days passed, however, his silence away at him. He found it increasingly difficult to look her in the eye, constantly on the verge of blurting out what he knew, and his guilt. Finally, one evening as they readied for bed, Cid sat her down, looking grave.

He had to tell her.

“Era”, he said, “I haven’t been entirely honest with you… I..”

“Saw something, didn’t you? When I had my headaches. They only went away after you had that nightmare.” She looked at him knowingly; his face an open book. “Really, what was so terrible you couldn’t tell me?”

With a deep breath, he began to regale her of his echo adventures, of his dream and his memory, but Era raised a hand to stop him.  
“I already know”, she said, smiling kindly. “It took a day or two for the dream to come back to me, but I remember it all now, both the bit that makes no sense and the bit I'm sure was your memory. I don't have my half of that memory, for the record. It's as blank as it ever was in my mind."

She laughed softly at his befuddled look, a somber thing, no true mirth behind the act, and reached out to tuck a lock of hair behind his ear.  
"You seemed so stressed, I wanted to wait till you felt comfortable talking about it before I said anything.” She stroked his cheek, aiming to comfort him. “I’m so sorry you had to live through that again.”

"Era, I failed you, left you to their mercy when helping was no longer convenient for me. I _wasn't_ by your side when you needed me."

"Of _course_ you weren't! Are you daft? Your father had just passed, why in the world would some girl you just met be a priority?"

Cid looked dumbfounded, like he'd been struck overhead with his own hammer.

"I'm really sorry about his passing. I know I always say, but…"

"I could have found you after. Should have." He insisted.

"You needed to be in Eorzea." Era countered matter-of-factly. She wasn't particularly interested in being the cause of his guilt. He had enough of that about too many things already. 

"You could have come with me." The somber note in his voice was lifting; now he was just being stubborn.

Era wasn't having it.

"Why would I have run off to a whole other continent with a boy _I_ just met? Especially with a family relying on me? Enough of this. You're confusing then with now, and being bullheaded about it besides. I promise, it worked out in the best way it could."

Cid huffed, having lost the not-argument. Really, she was far too measured, too calm, about things at times. The trouble with that being, despite desperately dreading it, he had been fully prepared for her anger. Prepared for her forgiveness, even. He hadn't been _at all_ prepared for her to just not give a damn.  There was no use in being petulant about it, however, not when she was like this. He knew if he kept up she'd just go sleep on the couch, and he hated that. 

So he conceded, nodding his head with an "Alright, alright" and changing the subject. "Your little stubby tail was adorable."

"Wh...what?" Era stammered, taken aback by the abrupt shift. "You think so?" She blushed. "Oh I don't know, I much prefer it as it is now."

"Well of course I prefer it now, it's lovely, but you have to admit it was quite cute, all short and fuzzy, waggling whenever you spoke." He paused for a moment, struck by a sudden realization. "...Do you think ours will have cute little tails?"

"Ours....?...Oh! Oh..." Her face was truly a remarkable shade now, burning as it was.

Cid's was no better off, a bright pink dusting his cheeks. "If...if you want them that is. In the future. I don't mean to… you know… considering everything..."

"I hope so!" She announced in a shaky voice, her face flushed deeper still, aforementioned tail quite fluffed. "I hope they have the cutest tails, and your nose, and...",  But she could say no more, for he had occupied her mouth with a ferocity. Whatever else she had intended became little more than a squeak as she was swept up into his arms.

He released her slowly, begrudgingly, regaining warmth he had lacked for days with each kiss. His gaze smoldered, woes not forgotten but set aside for now, voice heavy not with guilt, but with an almost unbecoming primal desire.   
It felt as if lead weights had been lifted from his shoulders.  
Despite it all, the insanity of it, the cruelty of it, she was happy. Actually happy. With him, and their lives...even wanted his children. _Seven bloody hells she wanted **his** children. _

"Then I'd say you're right, everything really did work out in the best way that it could."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank you to my friends over at Emet-Selch's Wholesomely Debauched and Enabling Book Club for letting me spitball my ideas for these last three chapters. They're wonderful, and if you like fic writing I'd encourage you to come say hi!  
> https://discord.gg/D7qF9RD


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